the florida "domestic violence" case ruling honestly makes me sick

Just last week, a Florida jury acquitted a man who killed his wife’s lover in his home after firing three shots into his head and back. But just months after Trayvon’s death, Florida’s notorious Stand Your Ground law did not spare Marissa Alexander, who fired a mere warning shot into the wall during a violent incident with her husband.
--Florida Judge Rejected Stand Your Ground Defense For Black Woman Who Fired Warning Shot During Domestic Violence

This is disgusting. What kind of message is this sending to domestic violence victims everywhere, that a women who fires warning shots can be sentenced to TWENTY YEARS when men who have killed in the name of self-defense can walk away scott free?

(Just as a warning, there are personal, possibly triggering details below re: abuse & domestic violence.)

A lot of the reason why I've become so feminist-y in recent years is because these issues have a lot of personal significance to me. My mother has been physically and emotionally abused by men all her life. One time when I was little, my father punched my mother in the middle of a dispute and bruised her in the face. Later, when things had settled down a bit, my uncle told my mother to try to forgive him because he "isn't a bad guy."

My mother is over 60-years old now and not once has any of her abusers ever apologized to her. Not once. And why should they when most people are so readily willing to forgive them or even defend them? Why should they feel sorry when victims of abuse are routinely told to "get over it" or that they somehow "deserved" it or that they're "disgracing" themselves and their family by even talking about it? Why should they apologize when the victims are essentially the ones who are punished for the crimes of their abusers?

Of course, my mother isn't the only person in the world who has experienced this. There are countless women AND men with stories like this. Sadly, the ruling from yesterday is just another link in a long chain.