-- DA -- YouTube -- tumblr --

Creepy Scary Dream

Totally just gonna talk about my dream and not post any art! ;D 'cause that's how I roll...

I feel so bad you gaiz...for the neglect of this website...;3; OH! By the way, I fixed meh keyboard so now I am talking much more casually~!

Anyway...on to my dream (because dreams are fun to share~! :D)

I am not sure what a nightmare is anymore...because I keep dreaming of scary things and then do not worry about does not bother me so much, just slightly disturbs me that I dreamt of that. I do not understand how I dreamt what I did because I was looking at Fire Emblem fanarts before I went to bed AND I played pokemon all day...sooo...Wut?

My dream...I do not remember how it started. I think it was some class field trip (not my class...I did not really know any of the people on the trip) and it was just pretty tame. The kids did not like the teacher, I mean, he was a bit of a jerk...I do not remember why, I just remember thinking that.
I do not remember how it got to the point where it did, but somehow a few of the students were locked into the classroom with the teacher.
The building the went to school in was part of their living quarters so they did not really need to go back to their rooms, but, the teacher should not be locking them in there.
The teacher was a genius scientist person and enjoyed experimenting, especially on his students. He tortured and kept alive the few students who remained in the classroom. If they did something wrong he would punish them in some terrible way. They were not allowed to leave and nobody seemed to care that they were missing.
The teacher enjoyed watching sadistic porn and forced the children to watch it with him. He dissected several animals and forced the children to dispose of them. The children do not know much about properly disposing of corpses so the room became sickeningly dirty with bacteria everywhere.

I remember there being 3 kids. There were two boys, one with black straight hair and the other with blonde spikey hair. The girl had short curly brown hair and looked like a doll. The girl's mind kind of strayed and I do not think she could stand to think any longer. The blonde haired boy was originally really spunky and the class clown, and now was the teacher's pet (not that sort of teacher's the disturbing disgusting sadistic kind).

The all lived in this classroom, chained to the interior walls, for many years, rotting in their own filth.

I do not remember how, but somehow the black haired boy and the girl got out and ran across the street to get help (it was more of a highway. There were shops on the other side, not houses or something, it was in a city). At first they were going to call the police, but then they got very terrified. For some reason they could not trust anybody. It seemed as if everyone knew the teacher very well and it would be impossible for anyone to listen to them if they told them of the terrible things he did. So they hid around for a while. Then they tried to devise a plan to save the blonde one.

I am not sure what happened after that...I think it was just some sort of dream time skip (XD) and the two who escaped are now grown up and married with a child, but this child is not actually the child of the black haired boy, but of the teacher. They seemed to have forgotten about the blonde boy or something...but now the teacher has been found out, his school raided, and the blonde haired boy saved, but he is now a man with the social skills of a child. The girl sees the blonde one at the story and falls to her knees crying. She tries to hug him, but he is afraid of being touched and just looks at her with fear in his eyes.

The teacher ends up dying somehow, so they can all relax now, but their lives will never be normal again. The blonde one can not adjust to society and goes back to the school to try and live there, but I mean...they are tearing it down because it is nasty. Anyway, he dies when they try to tear it down. He wanted to go back to the teacher because that is all he knew for most of his life. So depressing man...;3; In meh dreams!

But then the little boy that came from the teacher and girl is weird. They start talking about how the teacher/scientist was actually some sort of a genius. Although the scientist was thought of as mad and would have been put into an insane asylum, the victims believed he was actually quite sane and everything he did was for a reason. The scientist had several sorts of gruesome works of art, that could be seen as masterpieces if not for people knowing how they were made. They did not know what he was doing to them, but they know that whatever he did had some sort of purpose.

The little boy starts to act weird and more like the teacher/scientist.

Then more time skips and my brain trying to connect this with something...the little boy grows up to be like the teacher/scientist but does the experiments in a slightly more humane way.

Eventually more and more time skips until I get to the idea that I have had for a little while about a scientist who creates painful subliminal memories that create the greatest artists. Something about how stress on the mind allows for humans to use the full potential of their talents...

I dunno...I got the idea from reading meh psychology text book...XD

I thought it was interesting 'cause it was slightly realistic? Like that the blonde one wanted to go back to the guy who tortured him all this time, similar to most abusive relationships. Obviously I got that from Himitsu Top Secret, not some sort of genius or anything...but I do find that to be an interesting topic. I was also surprised that my dream went as far as analyzing itself. If the teacher/scientist was actually a great man from a different perspective. He is ethically and morally wrong, totally, but perhaps he helped science in many ways that the children can not fathom because all they know is that they lived a significant portion of their lives in pain and confusion.


What a weird dream...ughh...WHY BRAIN?! WHYYYY?!!!

Okay...I think I MIGHT do something fire emblem...or somethinngggggggggggg.....

ADIOS~! Sorry for the weird dream and long post! O.o;

Broken Elbow Apology

Sounds like the title of some art film...;D

But I must apologize for the major neglect! I feel so bad for completely ignoring theO. I blame my stupid Psychology has been stressing me out a ton...but I think I have a good handle on it and how I would like to be spending my time: Homework first, play second. I have been doing the opposite. If I make play second then my play becomes productive because I was doing something productive before. If I make it first I just watch the same video for hours...and then do homework reluctantly....

Not only that but I have been having too much fun with friends: Going to birthday parties, Japanese speech contest, hanging out for way too long at night and during dinner...So I blame socializing as well...

I need to do some art for theO...but I dunno what to do...;3; some slightly more interest/less complaining side of thingssss...I broke my elbow! Le gasp! The first time I have ever broken a bone! So now I have a cast...The problem here is that it is hard to put on clothes and shower...The bigger problem is that it is my right, dominant hand...;3; It is really hard to draw and I can not move my wrist because of the cast (which is actually a splint, not sure why I am calling it a cast...maybe less letters?)

I am also having problems with meh keyboard...for some reason all the symbols are jumbled...;3;

More news....spring is slowly coming and I do not say this because of the weather (I did, and then there was a snow storm and broke my yeah, the weather is a lie) but because love is in the air! I say this not with joy or positivity of any sort...I was asked out several times in a very short span of time. I would just like to know why. I mean, most people think I look like a 12 year old girl, so then why are people asking me out on dates. I refused all of them, and now I have realized that they just wanted to get to know me. If that is what they wanted they should have just sat down and talked to me like everyone else. I mean, they have excuses. I am friends with their friends or I am in the same class as them...Gosh, why does it have to be so movie-like and weird...I am not good with romance guys.

I may enjoy reading romance manga and fantasizing about that stuff, but real romance freaks me out...Not sure why. Some people may said it is because of fear of rejection, but no, I want rejection. I do not sticking with the same people for the rest of my life. It is the fear of being tied down...That is what I think.

Alas, I believe I am a hypocrite...because there is somebody I like and with every new guy to ask me out I find another reason to like him. I do not like it. I do not liking somebody this much...>3> I also do not know if is healthy either because he is a very innocent person who is not interested in romance. But I am not either. Maybe it is better that way. Bahh...spring is irritating me...

Also there is this really scary guy at my school who talks to my friends a lot and I talked to him a few times and now he is trying to friend me on facebook...I am so scared man! He is so scary...I do not want to be friends with him! ;3; Super duper aggressive and a bad influence...and he hangs out with my friends although they hate not know what to do because now he knows my name.

If you think I have been talking weird in this post it mainly because of my keyboard I have no other way of talking. I can not use apostrophes...soooo...


And all these great art contests I keep missing! ;3;

But the girlfriend of my good friend is also into art so I can fangasm with her about stuffs....maybe that will propel me into more posts on here? I need to talk to more people about art...I do not talk to many people in my art class...and I need to talk more to people about art. I think that is the main problem here...

All this talk about needing to do art...guess what I will do? Do some art! But again, elbow broken, so it will be with my left hand! XD


Killer Fusion

Because that fusion fun! ;3;

Originally just wanting to combine Light and Johan, but then I was like, hey, let's use another killer who looks cool and wears a suit. Then from the suit and light hairstyles I decided I should just use Maki (and 'cause Maki) thus these results.

I prefer drawing in this style than...any other style...Dunno why I don't more often. I'm afraid of getting to far away from the idolling style...but that might be for the better if I like this style better? I'm also afraid of ending up looking just like Takeshi Obata...hopefully that won't be the case.

As I was doing this I thought 'Maybe I should just do a fusion of serial killers'....and that would be really hard because do you know how many there are in anime/manga? Then I remember Rokuro Bundou...;3; He would've been perfect for thissss...Ah wellzz...

This is a very fun meme, maybe I will do more (but since I am saying that now I probably won't)


Mistakes in Professional Artwork pt.3

My last two posts...what were those all about?!

I recently have been looking at tons of artwork ever since coming across HUGE Phoenix Wright pictures in very high quality. I thought, if I can find these can't I find art from other artists in such high quality. So I spent most of this week doing just that, though, mainly looking at concept art (because that stuff blows my mind, all that white space and still so much form!)

Then I started noticing how they did what they did in each picture. How was I able to figure such a wild thing out? Well, experience from the programs that I know that they are using (ch'ya I can tell if you used SAI or Photoshop just from the look of your brush strokes), and something else. None of the pictures I looked at were 100% perfect. That is to say, they have really small mistakes that I would have counted as major faults in the artwork, except that if I saw the picture in slightly lower quality it would look like a masterpiece to me.

I've realized that I'm probably not the only one who freaks out about tiny mistakes. These little mistakes from professional artists have reassured me that the tiny mistakes are meaningless.

Is there one white pixel among a coloured space? Did you not colour one small colour? Is the colouring really flat and too striking close up? Does the lineart not match the soft shading of the rest of the drawing? Is the lineart the wrong colour? Are the eyes asymmetrical?

All these questions I've constantly asked myself as I was doing a picture, or looking back at the picture. I become so critical of myself I miss the big picture.

That's what every artist should focus on, the big picture!

You could criticize any form of art. Dancing, music, etc. Nothing is perfect, there is always a small detail. If you spend all your time trying to cover up all the most miniscule of holes, cover up every pixel in colour, you are wasting your time and energy and not looking at the picture as a whole.

As a whole where are the mistakes?

This is why when you look at a picture you should look at it from a distance.

Although that IS the point that I am getting to, looking at the small thumbnail of a picture, even if it looks really cool, is not what your actual picture looks like. I am also guilty of that large mistake. Fix it and shape it enough to where you could look at it at about 25-35% and think it looks good.

That is my big advice to all artists, but especially beginners. I've noticed a lot of beginners focus on so many small things that just get them stuck. The best thing to do it free your brush, your pen. Let it go all over the page. If you make a mistake use that mistake to form something new.

The painter is just a magician that makes a bunch of dots and squiggles look like a reflection of humanity.

Okie-dokie~! That's all I wanted ta say~! ;D

Mistakes in Professional Artwork pt.2

(Because of resizing noted mistakes may not be noticeable)