Ever was that kid who was afraid of the lighting?
The thunder?
Or maybe even both....
Me? I use to hate the rain....
It was on a rainy night my grandpa left my family...left the state....
He said he would come back...
That same night...
Hurricane (forgot which one) came, the one from 2000 came.... the apartment my family lived in...flooded..
Me and my sister and brother...young.
My mother...home with us.
Our father...working the night shift.
Three guys came in...took me and my brother and sister away from our mom.
We ended up being in a apartment...two stories up from the ground....
That night...I was crying like I never cried before...I was 5 or 6 years old... All I wanted was my mom. She was still in our apartment getting some clothes for us before it really got flooded in.
Even now...I want nothing to protect my mom. My dad. My family.
I hated rainy days because of that.
My grandpa leaving.. Us losing our apartment and living with people we knew nothing of who also had other families who were unfortunate as us to lose their apartment as well.
But how is it...one stormy night...caused me to hate my grandpa? Yes. I hate him.... I use to say I love him so much and I do all I can to see him...but that was a cover to the actual feelings I have... I hate him for leaving not only that....but for not keeping his promise to come back.
I hated the stormy nights. The rainy nights. I use to fear it... I use to fear the lighting. The thunder. Now... I hate it. I don't get scared I get angry, because I remember that night. As though it happened not to long ago...
But even now... I still want to protect my grandpa... hate him...now maybe.... but I still care, he is my family as well.
When will this storm pass..the hate in my heart end, the thoughts of not wanting and wanting to see my grandpa again.
The always run in the rain....over and over falling to my knees screaming up at the sky saying "I HATE YOU".... when will it pass...when will it just fade....when...will I forget...when...will I frgive?
