I finally get to hear from you.... after all the time it took from me to feel you were alright and think that nothing has happened to you...that you be ok even if it seemed you haven't given me a call back or the slightest hint that you were fine.... I remember... I would give a call when I didn't hear from you after a few days when you would usually call.... In the end.... you were going though things... Things I wish I could of helped you with. I heard of some of the things.... not all of it. But now... the night a night I never expected you finally speak.... I didn't care if I was suppose to be sleeping or not tired or not I just wanted to know if you were alright. You made me let out a sigh of relief to hear from you but then you tell me of the rest of whats been happening... anger and pain and other stuff.... what or how could i help... at all? Before I could give a word of advice but now.... I cant even give that. Somehow... I thought you wouldn't be thinking the things I would usually think.... those dark and miserable thoughts.... the ones that taunt me day and night but then again I didnt think most people or expect some people who have those thoughts either. But you are one I was not going to expect it from at all.... in all.... Im happy you had spoken.... and also happy to know your trying to give it your all.... To push forward even with things being bad for you.... And all I can do is hope that you will succeed in that my conscience who I loved and never forgot about even after you went silent on me and the rest..... just glad. Really glad.... thats all I wanted.... to hear from you.... I can give a smile here and there but you..... when you came to mind I could never really say I was happy knowing nothing of you but now.... I just want to try....to keep that connection still.... and not let you fall out of my reach again.... not again.... Not now.... I just got you back. I dont want to go thinking and wondering again ....