Who Am I? sesshy.uber.rad

Note: This is just a "journal entry" from somebody's diary (From Naruto). I'm not going to mention any names whatsoever in the entry either. ;] Guess who it is. When you think about it, this could really be ANY of the youngins in Naruto. So go wild. If it sounds 'emo' to you... Eh, well, I'm sure we've all felt these feelings once in a while. I tried to write it to make it relatable to everybody. So I hope you like it. ^_^ Remember, just because it sounds emo, don't automatically assume that I wrote this with Sasuke in mind.

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Dear Journal,

Today was a horrible day. I worked so hard today, I almost fainted from over exertion. Not to mention I heard the rumor mill today, and guess who's on it? Me. As if any of that is important though.

But today, I've been feeling depressed. Have you ever felt as if the weight of the world was on your shoulders? Like, if you moved just an inch, everything as you knew it would crumble and you would fail everybody? It's just lately everybody has been saying "Do this. Do that. Get it done." I have things to do too. Well, I have things to do too. It's like, I'm breathing for them or something. I know that if I left, nobody would notice. They would find some other person without a life to do their things for them. Am I a fool for letting them control me? Yes, but I feel as if I OWE everybody something. I'd feel like an evil person for NOT doing what they ask me to do for them. It's little things. And big things. But when they ignore you afterwards, not even a thank you or a glance, it leaves a scar. It's like, a word is forever etched into your mind after each deception and betrayal. "Alone" "Unwanted" "Faker" My mind is a canvas. I'm an artist. Watch me as I paint. Am I right?

Not to mention, THEY will never notice me either. (You remember who THEY indicates right?) When they walk in a room, it's like a dying sun. A falling star; bright, brilliant, and huge. They're always occupied with a fellow star though, just as bright, just as brilliant, twice as huge. They would never notice me, a black hole, who just sucks in all misery. Don't get me wrong, black holes are interesting, but only for a second. Then WHOOSH, the falling star flies by, and the black hole is just what it is. And even though I laugh at all the people that are captivated by all the shiny bright lights, I'm one of them as well. It's hard to resist. It's hard to turn your head away. I've tried too many times. I've told myself "stop, you know that they'll never love you. You're going to hurt yourself. And for what?" But who am I kidding? That NEVER works.

Well, I must stop here. Somebody's calling for me... Ha, see my point?

Author
sesshy.uber.rad
Date Published
10/01/08 (Originally Created: 09/30/08)
World
The Backroom
Category
Naruto Fan Words
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