It’s not easy being a child genius. I was raised at Wammy House, just like all the other smart kids. All of them were amazing, one girl was an artist with photographic memory… the perfect combination. She’s a billionaire, now. However, no matter how hard I tried, there was one kid I couldn’t ever beat. I didn’t know his name (But then, we never gave our true names to anyone) but everyone called him Near. “Good things will always happen when you are Near.” He had said, the one we were raised to become. You could say this man was a God to us, we were raised to his logic, his intelligence. One day… he was killed. A heart attack, brought on by a murderer. And so, Near and I were called into our Master’s office. Near sat on the floor, a pure-white puzzle in his hands, trying to solve it. I just did what I normally did, ate chocolate and looked good.

Near was chosen to succeed Him. With that, the race was on. I had to find the killer before Near did, and I would willingly take my own life if I didn’t. I found the murder weapon- A mysterious notebook, believe it or not. I used the murder weapon (or rather, forced others to). I threatened to President of the United States. I was on top, and the killer, a man aliased as Kira, would soon be mine. And yet, Near was always a step ahead, even as I held the weapon in my hands, Near simply brushed me aside. I was not happy, to say the least. The Japanese police force even teamed up with Kira, to bring me down. And they succeeded… But I was able to kill one, in the end. I blew up the building we were in, scarring my face in the process.

Even so, I’ll never be as good as Him. Near may get close… I don’t know. But as I lay here in bed, I can see Him in my head… I can see him, standing as he would, his thumb in his mouth, as they said he had. “Mello, you’re not good enough.” He’ll say, and shake his head. “Not enough to surpass Me. And if you can’t do that… what else do you have? Nothing. You need to beat me, but you can’t. And that rips you apart.”

I close my eyes, a single tear rolling down the scars on my face. I’ll never be good enough, no matter how hard I try. Near will always be better, quicker, smarter. One day… I’ll kill him. It’s the only way. At least then I can say that I’m the best. Even if I’m not as good as Him, I can still be the best. And… laying here, I think I’ve finally understood something. The reason I hate to lose. “He tried so hard.” They say. “He did his best.” And then there’s the old favourite. “At least he gave it a go.” And I can’t stand it. There’s never a future reference. Never a Present tense. Always the past. Always. I won’t have it anymore. I won’t have anyone talk about me in the past tense! From this day forward, I promise… I will succeed! I will beat Near! And I will prove to you, Mother, that I am the best!