Hi, I'm Apanda! This world will have updates about my life and stuffs. So yeah, it'll be pretty boring... Sorry. -_-
My Loveless name is Worthless.
1. lacking in usefulness or value; "a worthless idler" [ant: valuable]
2. morally reprehensible; "would do something as despicable as murder"; "ugly crimes"; "the vile development of slavery appalled them"; "a slimy little liar" [syn: despicable]
My fruit is mango: Though the outer rind is colourful and deeply hued,
Its kevlar-type resistance cannot be consumed. Deep underneath the reddish orange rind though, is so much soul and nutrient compassion.
My new favorit quote's:
1. “Love is something that you’d get hurt about. Getting hurt, feeling pain... if you don’t feel it, then that’s not love.”
2. "You can never have the same love twice. When one love ends... even if you fall in love with someone else...you can never have the same love again. Even love matures. Its like a flower. Cherish it while it blooms."
Quote by Nanba, from Hana-Kimi For you in full bloom.
3. "Pure love means loving only one woman. Shes the one you hold most precious. She's so dear to you that no other woman would even enter your field of vision."
Quote by Makoto, from W Juliet.
4. "Its like I'm always the only one in love here."
Quote by Yukari, from Paradise Kiss.
5. "Watch for that signal, when life as you know it ends."
Quote by Jerry, from P.S. I Love You.
And now here's a song From the new All American Rejects CD that i really like.
you know these stupid face thingys dont work for me... i mean they did the first few times but now they dont. Hm, its probably just the computer though.
...
Anyways, im a little less angry today, now im just really depressed. actually its a little more like self loathing... i guess.
but yeah, point here is, is im still not in a good mood. which sucks, but what can you do right...
i have detention today and tomorrow. and at first i was really depressed about it, but i found out that Justines gonna wait for me after school so that cheered me up a lot. ^_^ so thank you!
...
Hm?
i had physical therapy again yesterday, and it was boring, but good. the guy said i was doing really good, and moving along fast, he was actually suprised. and i got to bring home some putty... is it puddy or putty? anyways, im just supposed to grip it on and off for like 3 minutes a night to strengthen my left hand. and yeah... thats it for that.
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Oh i started my 4 by 5 in art today. i already cut out the square platform, and now im building a little panda, and im going to build a bunch of bamboo around him... yeah... now that doesnt really sound that exciting does it... Meh, whatever.
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Oh i officially hate my english class... ok so i always hated my english class, but now i hate it more. and its my fault, cause im just being really stuborn... about the whole Tony thing. he just ignores me and talks to tana, which is fine cause i hate him. but this kinda proves something that ive always thought. if i just left everybody, nobody would chase after me. and thats fine, im actually kinda happy about this whole thing cause it proves that i was right for once. so HA!
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although i guess thats not something to be happy about.
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whatever.
me goes now.
hopefully this depression thing wont last too long.
yeah im really angry right now... and my reasons are the same old stupid ones so im not going to explain them.
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so i guess just, im sorry if i say or do anything stupid today. im pretty sure i wont snap at anyone, ill probably just act like nothings wrong, but if i do, im sorry and dont take what i say seriously. actually, dont take anything that i say today seriously cause its probably just me lying.
sorry.
i really did want to be in a good mood today, but like always, nothing ever turns out the way i want it to.
so whatever.
i dont care.
actually im starting to just not care about anything anymore. everything just seems so far away. like ill never get there. so im just kinda giving up... on everything. cause im good at that, just giving up, and cause nothings ever going to be the way i want it to be.
sorry if that sounds selfish.
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although i doubt anyone cares if im selfish, or not selfish, or if i care or not.
i guess i just feel really distant. like everyones just leaving me behind like always. even though everybodys still here, it just feels off.
i know ive said this before but, i really just wish that everything could go back to the way things used to be. back when everyone actually cared about each other...
nothing matters anymore.
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sorry, i know this is really depressing, but i needed to just put some things out there i guess...
and im so freaking happy. i hate school, but my hate for not being able to see my friends is stronger. so me is happy to be back at school. although that sounds wierd coming from me, lol.
so how was everybodys breaks? i hope everyone had a decent time.
mine sucked, but you already know that. what you dont know is that my mom made us stay an extra day in alabama... yeah, i was pissed. she had asked us before if it would be ok if we stayed an extra day but me and korie were just like, hell no. i mean theres NOTHING to do down there. the only good things about that whole trip was my grandmas great home cooking, and i got two manga books. other then that, it sucked. but anyways, she got really angry at us for not wanting to stay, shes all like they're my parents, and we never get to see them. and i get that, i really do, but im to fucking selfish to care. i just wanted to go home and take a nice long shower (they have like NO water pressure, and have to pay for the water so my mom made us take 10 minute showers, and i usually take 30 minute showers, not cause im slow, just cause its my only real alone time, and i think well when im in there) and sleep on a real bed (i was sleeping on an air matress). so anyways, she ended up not talking to us (so immature) and went to bed all pissy. then the next day i finally couldnt take it anymore and told her that we could stay, but that i wasnt doing ANY chores that day. and she agreed. it felt like i was the fuckin parent.
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now onto other news.
our computer is still messed up. and im really freaking out cause i think sombodys going to be able to find out what i was looking at. and if that happens my moms going to flip. she'll get rid of the internet all together, and ground me, and go through all my stuff, and my manga, and my anime... id be so screwed.
T-T
right now i dont even care about getting the internet back, i just dont want her to find out what i was looking at...
and i think she already suspects something.
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im so screwed.
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anyways, next topic is acen. rachel cant come, and now me and Justine dont have a room... this sucks, i had a feeling this was gonna happen. and now im also really worried about rachel.
i dont know why i always ask that, cause nobody ever answers.
-_-
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well today my mom made me get up at 8:10 to go out into town and stuffs with my grandma. (my grandma also has to see a doctor) so while they're at the docs, they dropped me and korie off at the library. so yeah...
and although im happy that i get to go on the computer, im actually still kinda bored. other then posting, ive really got nothing to do.
