Random Thoughts of a Vampire

In this day and time, it's quite ironic to see how humans and vampires can coexist in the same society. Those who were once considered as our...heh, "supplementary diet", have recently started building a place for us to dwell in. Not only that, but they have also become engrossed in our existence to the point of seeking us out. This, however, is natural. Humans by nature are curious creatures. Once their minds have been introduced to an unfamiliar thing, they will act to it in either of two ways: neglect it and become ignorant for all time, or find a way to get closer to it in order to uncover what they can about it. This merging of worlds...this was already an expected outcome from the start.

Ironically though, as much as people would create images of us in their minds, their common perspective of us is false. To think that they'd want to know more about us, when they themselves merely rely on some cheap folklore or badly pieced urban legend. I still believe that there's no point in seeking us out if they merely think we're monsters from some made up story.

It can’t be helped, I guess.

Humans have been presented with only little facts of our true existence. It's particularly hard to grasp what our true nature is really like. In turn, vampires, who have been living with humans for centuries, have grasped a human's understanding and perspectives. I believe only a handful of humans know of our coexistence. We live under their noses, but the majority would refuse to believe if one of our kin decided on disclosure. The average, narrow minded fool would often believe that we're crazy or that we're making it up, and that simply makes us believe that humanity is not ready for the truth that they've always desired to gain.

It's quite surprising how they've created different sorts of deviations of us; The media being the biggest contributors to these. From merciless slaughterers of the night to loving sparkling wonders that try so hard to deceive humans...our image has been tainted. Where did all the decent ponderers go?

We’re depicted as scum who kill and drink blood for no good reason, murderers, beings who have a weird blood fetish whom reside on the edge of insanity. We vampires, however, can contain our blood-lust. Does everyone think that we always feed on a live host? We can drink medical blood if we want. We can drink the blood of animals if we're desperate...we can feed by accumulating a human's energy. We're not simply limited to blood alone...even though it's quite the healthy meal...gives us more strength...and is much more appealing.

On another side note...what vampire sparkles under the sun's light? For centuries...Vampires have evolved. Our Ancestral kin were shunned during the day in fear of turning to dust. As the years passed, the later generation ventured out into daylight. They didn’t die from exposure, but since undead skin isn’t actually as good as the real thing, they suffer from skin burns. Minimal amounts of sunlight aren’t as life threatening as movies make it seem. Now, harsh sun rays; that would be a problem. A few years after suffering this curse, vampires began to breed with humans. Dhampirs. They don’t burn under the sun due to the lineage they get from their human parent (which is usually the mother). And then as the years passed again, we vampires have grown to become accustomed to light. But it doesn’t mean we sparkle under its influence. We get sunburns but we never sparkle. We're not some kind of divine being; we were coined "monsters" by this ignorant race at one point, after all.

Hmn...I will never come to understand how humans think.

But I suppose something that makes us noteworthy is our ability to charm people. We don’t sparkle to make ourselves appear charming. We are by nature mysteriously seductive without even trying. Perhaps it's in the way we move, act, speak, and think. It could also be because of our physical looks. Our eyes alone can do the talking. Hypnotic, if one would wish it to be, and this is the aura of our charm. We don’t need words to convey any message. We can simply glance at someone, offer a smile, and then they'll follow like mindless pets. The human heart can be so weak at times.

There is something that bothers me though: The misconception that we fall in love or express any emotion. In truth, if you're a vampire or if you're turned to one, you lose all those feelings. You become cold and ruthless. The reason why we can’t express it though, as if it is natural, is because we comprehend what it is. It's a weapon, if you will. Because we comprehend, we are able to showcase it. Emotions in itself are an abomination; a weakness. But it's the kind of weakness that, when used properly, becomes a frightening tool. We don’t fall in love, we only fancy. When we feel compelled to protect a human, it's because we are fond of them. Some might think that it's because the human belongs to them. A vampire protecting another is brought about by kindred spirit. As for Dhampirs and Dhampiresas, they'll always be a traitor to both races due to being part human and part vampire...it's quite the complication really.

But even with this kind of complication, they are living together peacefully now.

...
...
...

Ah, who am I lying too, really? It's almost a one sided relation. Only a handful of the populace believes. The Majority is oblivious. This must be the secret to this peaceful coexistence.

Then again, this little girl's mind vouching for me isn’t exactly what I'd call the mind of an expert. However, it’s close enough to be seen as someone who has a grasp of what the truth might be. Has she encountered one? Probably. I can’t tell.

Although, I believe this one thing to be true:

They don’t make vampires like they used too in the old days.

A vampire's name in this present time is robbed of it’s true meaning. The lot who claims to be our Kin...abhors us. This does not apply to all...just to the mass that confuses themselves with us.

We are married to the darkness. Those who desire us simply for immortality and thrill are fools. Do they think that watching the decades pass is a thing of amusement? To be honest, it gets quite dull after a while. The world will change and so will the people whom reside in it. But these are all just hollow shells trying to cover up the last generation of the world. Change, as constant as it is, cannot prevent a soul from being corrupt. It cannot prevent the deterioration of nature. Change cannot completely secure life, and watching this for centuries... is like watching a replay of a boring old drama.

It's rather foolish to think that eternal damnation(immortality) is a thing of wonder. But of course, this is just me. The thoughts possessed by my other kin may differ from mine. I cannot force my ideals on them since that is disrespect. These are merely opinions and musings coming from a rather bored and contemplative child of the night.

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Ahahaha, that's just my little rantings...or should I say that annoying vampire that lives inside my head. -points at the post- See, SEE?! He even insulted me there! Ah but I guess that can be considered a complement as well.

I'm just glad that you guys decided to drop by and take a look at this serene little place. I guess this could be called my little black box. A get away from the vices of the world. It's nice here I guess. Quite and very much peaceful.

The winds are blowing and the night fowls sing in their little happy orchestra. It's a beautiful place. And I only hope that you will feel at home in my world as well. Enjoy~

Why "do" Fools Fall in Love

A very very dear person asked, Why "do" fools fall in love?". It was a pretty simple question for a fool like me I guess.

"Fools don't need a reason to fall in love, they just do." Was what I said.

Just like how love waits and is patient, or how love's trials isn't a sacrifice but merely blessings in disguise, fools doesn't need a reason to love.

Love is unconditional, right? We don't have to say we love them, but instead we do it. Empty words cant compare to brim-filled actions. Gestures are enough to convey a simple message of love. From just a simple hug or from one soft gentle kiss...such small gestures can speak for you by a thousand fold.

Foolish lovers does not pick a partner as well. A bond grows in time. Grows with friendship, hardship and trials. Sometimes a fool may say, "I'm not into you." while the other says, "I'm not into you too." then simply smiles and laughs it off...trivial talk. But then you wake up one morning only to find your heart in contradiction. A foolish lover will be confused, but a foolish heart will always yearn and eventually know the truth.

A foolish heart can endure any pain. Meager fights, ugly misunderstandings, and hurtful separations. Innocent foolishness can cause all these, but if you know what you feel is true...then surely...a happy end will see you through.

A foolish heart can also tell if this one is the only one. No matter how close or now far...distance is never the case. What's important is a loving heart which never gives up and which never ceases to love.

The same hearts will always become tuned to one another, like the red string of faith the closely binds to lovers together.

But in the end, even if gestures are enough...there's still a need to reiterate...

"Even if that's the case...because if for some reason I'm not hear to tell you how I really feel, you'll always know how to my view you have become so dear."

Ragdoll

Money wasn’t always everything.

There were times when I thought there were more important things in life. There were family and friends alike, and then there was the code and virtue. The ones I and my team followed so strongly that we would do anything to achieve our goal.

The happy days...

But in the long run, when everything goes horribly wrong, you’ll realize that those people who you think values your existence would simply throw you away like an old used rag. Not only that, you’d soon realize that the code you follow were just a bunch of self satisfying lies that are imposed by superiors. In reality, you’re just a tool that soon becomes trash. When everything else fails, there’s no one left to turn too.

That is of course with the exception of money.

Money unlike people doesn’t judge you for who you are. It can get you into places and give you what you want? A temporary home, food and drinks, medicine, temporary friends and even temporary lovers; there was no real limit to what money can buy...or is there?

I wasn’t exactly the kind to care for others. I had too little money to live by anyways, that’s why I can’t understand why I’m here in this crappy little cramped motel room with a young child of about five. Right now she was simply sleeping soundly. Her clothes were dirty and partly ripped. She looked frail with a pale complexion. Her hair was messed up as she comfortably shifted in the stiff mattress that was a crappy excuse for the bed, but she still looked so adorable nonetheless. If I could compare her to something, I’d say she’d be a worn out porcelain doll. If I tried selling her to the black market, I’d definitely earn a lot of cash, but I think I held back for some reason. That reason though, I had no idea off. She could have been easy money too. Then again, I had no idea why I took her with me in the first place. It’s not like she was anything special.

As I looked at her like that, I could remember how she was staggering by the market, begging for some money. Like hell anyone would spare her any change. People just passed by the hungry-looking child without a care. I did the same only to find out that she had started to follow me. Of all the people, why did she decide to follow me?

At that time, people were looking at me strangely as well. I couldn’t care. Although I would have liked to knock their heads off their necks as they stared on. My mask was placed properly over my face while my hair messily draped along my shoulders. I had no cloak with me at that time as well due to my old one being too worn out to even be worn. The stitches along my skin showed. The black lines slightly above my wrist showed as well. There were too many stitches on me that surely I didn’t appear human. It’s not like I cared. But I glared back at them slightly, just to let them know that their gawking was pissing me off. They turned away. My eyes must have scared them to some extent. People never did find my eyes normal, but it didn’t matter. It’s not like they can do anything about it anyway.

For a moment, I stopped to buy an apple. I didn’t have much money on me, since I had no luck with the bounty hunting. It pains me to even let go of these few pieces of shimmering coins. But then again, even cheapskates had to eat. As I picked one juicy large apple, something latched onto my leg. When I looked down, it was the child.

Annoying.

I shook my feet and commanded her to let go. She did not comply; instead she merely latched on even tighter. A small grunt left my partly stitched but masked lips, she was rather persistent.

“Let go.”

I spoke again, trying to be patient, but to no avail it was not working. Trying not to work up a nerve, I plucked her from my leg and raised her up by clutching onto her tattered shirt’s back collar much like one would do while picking up a cat. Her large doe eyes simply stared at my deep lime emerald ones, seemingly unafraid. Just as I was to tell her off, she did something quite unexpected. The little pest reached out her hands with a smile, seemingly wanting to grope my head.

“Doll! doll! doll! Giant talking doll!”

So that’s why she had been following me. Because of my stitches, I might have looked like a rather big ragdoll to the young girl. It kind of made me want to smile, but my lips were so stiff that it couldn’t be afforded.

There was a little stirring on the bed as the young girl buried herself in the semi clean sheets. She really looked adorable when she was sleeping. Actually after I brought her here and shared that apple with her, she instantly fell asleep. Must be tired from all the walking around she had done prior to our unexpected meeting. Still, she really looked like a doll while sleeping. Perhaps cuteness can’t be bought. After all, she did come for free.

“Hmn...”

End