Axel's Experiences

( Note: This was written many years ago and does not contain information of anything past the date that it was finished. For any extra information on recent occurrences, please feel free to reply with your questions, or PM Axel. - SERIOUS REPLIES ONLY! )

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For a long time now, ever since I was little, I've been having these visions. Not only visions, but I always had a specific date embedded in my mind as if it had some meaning behind it that I should know about. That date was 12th December 2012. It wasn't until recently, when I began to look it up, that I actually realized that it was an actual important date.

But, first things first. It all actually began when I woke up one morning when I was sleeping in my mothers room. (I think I must have been frightened by something that night.)I sat up rather suddenly and randomly thought about the Sphinx at Giza. It was a strange feeling, as if I instantly knew something was underneath it, or that there was more to it than there seemed.

A short time after this event, I began to feel such a strange connection to the God Osiris. The feelings, in fact, grew stronger as the days, months and years went on. I just have to look at his face and I get all these emotions sweep through me. Its weird... I'll start to cry and feel like I'm grieving or something. It is so intense at times, I feel like nothing in the world can console me.

After a while of pondering about certain things, I started to, as I say, wonder about what was under the sands in the Giza region and I don't know how or even why, but I came to the conclusion that the tomb of the God Osiris was there.

I'm starting to feel a little strange talking about this, I get butterflies when I talk about it, so bear with me if I go round in circles a bit. It's hard to concentrate with ones stomach doing flip-flops. Haha.

Anyway... Ever since that morning when I was little, I've been having strange visions. On these occasions, I've been totally awake and on the odd occasion I've been staring out of my bedroom window and then something would flash into my brain.

The first of these came a couple of months after that morning... I don't remember what I was doing at the time, but a place suddenly flashed in my head, but then vanished.

It was a large room, a tomb type chamber, with two of those large bowls with oil burning in them (I'll just call them oil burners) the floor was made of dark marble and the rest of the room was made of sandstone, marble and granite. In the centre of the room was either a sarcophagus or some similar shaped slab and on/in it was a body lying peacefully with their eyes closed. It was a man.

Not long after i had this, they found what they believed to be 'The Tomb of Osiris' (Symbolic, so they say) under the sands at Giza.

The next vision came a while afterwards...

It was during the day and again, it was a long time ago, so I don't recall what I was doing at the time...

It flashed in my head and left again.

It was the time of day when the sky is still blue, but the sun has started to set slowly turning everything orange. There were birds playing in the sky and in amongst the trees either side of an avenue of Sphinxes with Rams heads and there was a man in a chariot riding down it being drawn by two white horses decked out in ostrich feathers. The man was wearing a blue skull cap style thing. But, what I found interesting was that I actually became aware of myself. I was dressed in white linen and I had gold ornaments. Necklaces and such. I had long black hair. (I have long, brown hair in real life, as you can see from my picture.)

I was stood in the entrance to what seemed to be a temple or another sacred building and there were 2 dark corridors, one leading left, the other right with an oil burner at the start of each.

The strange part about these visions is that they only last a split second each time and yet they are so detailed... I can smell things, hear things, taste things... And in this one there was a heavy scent of Incense.

It was actually a while till I had another of these after this one. But, sure enough, I had another.

It was roughly around 2004 and I was sat on my bed at around 4 in the afternoon looking out the window at the sky when suddenly an image flashed in my head as usual. It was as though I was blind for a second, but it passed.

This one though faster than normal. It was so fast, in fact, I only caught a glimpse of the place and it kinda freaked me out a bit.

About a day later, it happened again, but this time it wasn't as sudden.

I was in white again, with black hair... I was reclining on a long seat with 2 purple cusions beneath me. There were 2 people either side of me. To my left was a man holding something to keep the sun from off of me and to my right was another man with a Flabellum (Fan of feathers) slowly fanning me as it was around midday and the sun was hot. I could hear the distant call of a falcon and there was a very slight cool breeze. Also to my right, there was a table with a large bowl of fruit on it and next to that were musicians playing such a sweet tune.

To my left in the distance I could plainly see what I saw the day previously when it flashed in my mind. It was the pyramids, which I found really strange.

A few days after I had yet another... It was a dark room with 2 oil burners either side or a large statue of Bast(et) the cat goddess and there was a sound almost like a gong or something large made of metal being struck and incense again filled the air.

The thing that is most weird is I'm always wide awake when this happens. I'm never tired or drifting to sleep, I'm always doing something.

I've told many people about it and they have all said the same thing. Which is, in itself, a little strange. But, I won't say what they have said, because I wouldn't want to influence any comments.

Now, in the past there has been some misunderstandings, so I'll just list the ones I've answered.

1: My interest in Egypt only came about BECAUSE of these weird 'visions', so it is impossible for it to influence my thoughts in any way at all.

2: I am not claiming to be anyone, or anything.

3: It can't be a memory from an early childhood trip to Egypt as we have NEVER been, or a childhood memory from TV shows, as I never watched them. (I didn't care for it much.)

4: When I've had these visions, I've been both alone and with people. Sometimes I'll be on my own in my room or in the lounge and other times I've been with my Mother, or Brother when its happened.

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I know one thing... there seems to be a strange link to the number 2 in my 'visions'. 2 White horses, 2 Oil Burners, 2 people, 2 cushions etc etc... In the Osiris legend, I know that 2 seemed highly significant towards his scattered body parts. 2 feet; 2 legs; 2 thighs; 2 hands; 2 forearms; 2 upper arms etc etc... December 25 was Osiris' resurrection day and that is ruled by Capricorn. (My sign.) and Isis was born on the 4th day and I was born on the 4th day of the 1st month. But, these probably don't mean anything. I don't know.

I had another strange thing happen on the 1st of January of the other year... I was just lying down this morning trying to keep warm (blasted weather) when I decided to see how comfy it was to lay how they used to wrap mummies up. I thought it'd be a right laugh. My Mom and my brother were in the house and Mom had just nipped down stairs to fix dinner and I was in her room.

But when I did it, I had a strange sensation sweep over me, almost like a falling feeling and I felt myself, rather strangly, in another enviroment. I feel silly saying this, but it seemed as if I was sealed in a sarcophagus. But the strange part was, I was rising up throught it, almost like I was in a spirit form or something. The feeling wouldn't go away, but I had decided I wanted to explore my so called visions from now on, so I tried to keep hold of it for a little while longer. But, as soon as I broke the cross shape my arms were making the enviroment and feeling vanished.

Over the past 5 years, more things have happened. For instance, my very first Egypt dream...

In this dream I was stood looking at the pyramids (it was around mid-day again and there was lots of heat haze.) and there was this temple-like building with painted walls. The roof was surrounded by very ornate carved decoration in the shape of lotus flowers and the picture beneath it was very bright and colourful. Is was Osiris reclining on one of those lounger-type beds that the Egyptians liked and he was in his full outfit (the red green, gold and black striped Atef crown with gold horns and uraeus, the very extravagant criss-cross wrappings and unlike his usual green skin, he had his black skin [Which symbolises death and re-birth.]) Behind him was Khepri the Scarab headed god... He usually symbolises Morning (Khepri-Ra) and stood in front of Osiris to the right of the picture was Ra with his big wings outstretched as if giving adoration or acknowledgement. Behind Ra was Khnum the Ram-headed god...

The odd thing with this you see, is that out of all of them I only really have a strong connection with Osiris... Why did the other 3 feature? And the only one out of the trio doing anything was Ra. I have been trying to figure it out for some time now.

I remember one night in 2004, I was watching the stars and there were clumps of broken cloud floating through the sky being illuminated by the moon. A part of the sky caught my attention as there was a perfect line being made by the gap in the clouds. (I had seen this before. A few years ago me and my brother were walking up the street and we saw a perfect square of light in the sky.) I watched this shape turn into a triangular gap (every side perfect) then some of the cloud seeped down into the gap forming what I recognised as the inside plan of the great pyramid. You may be thinking yeah right, pure coincedence, but this was so so detailed, if you saw it you would understand. Suddenly as I was watching the shaped moved down and converged to make yet another shape. It looked just like Osiris. The detail was magnificent... You could see his face, his crown, everything! He was lying down with his eyes closed and there was a figure stood next to him which... looked scarilly like me. It had my hair and everything. The so called 'me' leaded down (the movement was just as if they were real people.) and I'm not sure what happened, but it looked as if 'I' almost kissed the reclining-sleeping 'Osiris' figure. 'Osiris' opened his eyes and turned his head to face the 'Me' shape. and the suddenly the clouds went. I mean, literally.

The thing is, this all happened in the space of about 20 mins all in the SAME spot in the sky! The clouds around it were moving across the sky at a normal rate, but these stayed stationary!

The topic I feel I should get back to, though, is that of Osiris. You know, my feelings towards him. I am so confused about it. I can't exactly tell what sort of emotion it is. I mean... If someone makes your blood boil when you look at them, then that is obviously hatred and if you see a dead person and cry thats sadness etc. So maybe you can help here. I really don't know. I just want to know what emotion it is that I'm feeling here, because it is something I have never felt before in my life.

When I see him, I feel a mixture of things at one time, sometimes even contradictory feelings. My heart feels heavy, but I just cannot take my eyes away from his face. I just have to look at him to feel happy. It does that no matter if I'm down or not, I just take one look and I'm fine again, but at the same time there is something else, in the pit of my stomach that makes me feel as if I'm missing something. Another odd feeling I have had since I was younger, is I feel as if I need to 'find' him or something. Like he exists and I need to be with him and stay with him for the rest of my existance. I feel as if I cannot live without him being with me. But, also, at the same time as feeling a strange euphoria, I feel as though I'm in mourning. A heavy feeling hits me and, these days especially, I have even started to cry. Often uncontrollably. Why do I feel like I need to be with him forever and that I cannot bear to be without him? It's not as if I ever knew him, is it?

A couple of years ago, I began to feel strange sensations in my body. Almost as if a God is present. Not in the house, but very close by. For instance... One morning and the morning after that, I awoke to see the sun shining brightly on everything, lighting things up in the most beautiful way. And it felt as if Ra himself was very close, in the sky or something, and I felt a strong sense of comfort.

Then, a few weeks later, I felt a similar feeling, but it was not in the sky, it was in the trees and plants. An image popped in my head and I bet you can't guess who it was... Yes, you guessed it, Osiris. Even though I felt comforted by it and very happy, I also felt an overwhelming force in my chest. I began to cry. The strongest sense of mourning or sadness I had felt so far overwhelmed me.

I have had other visions since, but they have all been based around Giza...

I have also found a place that resembles the room with the sarcophagus in my first vision! I have never ever seen this before appart from in my vision, so I'm a little confused to say the least.

Nowadays, the feelings are much stronger. It no longer freaks me out, like it did when I was younger, but it is still confusing me. I have such a strange niggling feeling at the back of my mind, like I know exactly what this is all about, but my mind won't let me accept it yet, or something.

When I read things to do with Osiris, I cry. If I read hymns to Isis, I feel strangely comfortable. I read something last night actually (The Laments Of Isis And Nephthys) and I felt so upset, it actually physically hurt. It is a beautiful piece of ancient writing, but I couldn't enjoy it properly for how oddly upset I felt.

Over the past few years, I have also found myself trying things like Automatic Writing. (And also the drawing equivalent.) I sat down and began to write and when I sat back, I was shocked by what I had written. It was like a hymn, or poem, or something.

This is what I wrote:

"You reside within a distant land.
Far away, your spirit rests.

My heart knows of your existance,
as you call to me without a word.

It pains me to be so far from you.
Your face not staring at me with an expression of love.

May my mind become all knowing so that I may find you.
Let my days be filled with thoughts of the happy songs we will sing.

Yes, when we are together, we will sing joyfully.
Even the earth itself will resonate with a melodius hum upon our meeting.

Until that time comes, be patient as I am having to be.
Only in our dreams are we allowed to see each other.
Yet I am satisfied.
I am happy.

Hold on my love for that day.
The day that echoes like mirrors on mirrors in my dreams.
Hold on till I speak my words to you.
Till they wake you from your slumber."

My face was a picture, I can tell you...

Well, I hope I haven't sent you all to sleep with this. Haha. It's just so confusing for me, even now that I'm starting to feel like I'm coming to terms with it all. I still feel like I need answers.

Please. Those of you who are bothered, give me some of your thoughts. I have asked people, Mediums, Friends, Family and Egypt enthusiasts, in their HUNDREDS (literally) about this, but I would like to know your thoughts. I need all the opinions I can get to try to help me piece this together.

End