Last night I had to make the hardest decision I ever have...

I chose my relationship with my parents over my girlfriend...and she's completely deviated. It hurts me so much, and I'm so angry with myself for letting it come to this. I'm hurting her SO much right now....All I can do is scramble to fit the pieces back together...and pray everything will somehow work out..I can't imagine a world where she isn't in my life, and I'm terrified she's going to hurt herself...I told her that I just wouldn't be able to take that...If she ever did, I would hate myself more than anything...

I have to believe this is for the best, though...and I have to believe that everything will turn out alright. If I don't...then how can I even stand to go throughout the day? Where will I get the strength to even go to school or even leave the house...? I made it as clear as possible that I still loved her very much...and that she still means so much to me...I just PRAY that things will work out..

It might be awhile until any of you guys hear or see me...I don't much feel like getting on and talking--I just want to recluse myself for now... I'll come back eventually, and I'll miss you guys very much...but what I'm going through now is just too much...

Please, please, please...Pray for me--even if you don't believe in God, think of me, wish me the best of luck...I need all of that...I need support...

Thank You,
Becki.