- Created By bellpickle
what the fuck
Okay. Either DHB is avoiding me or some really weird shit is going down. Because I've been trying to contact him for the past two hours and there's been nothing. He's not in his room, but he's been on facebook during this period of time, so he's obviously alive somewhere. And he hasn't really been talking to me much the past couple days and I don't know why. Yesterday, I thought he was just in a mood or something, so I left him alone... but now I think there might really be something wrong cause he still ain't talking much. And since yesterday, he hasn't been responding to my texts when I ask him if he's in his room.
This is just... weird. I'M the one who gets all avoidant and deathly-silent for seemingly no reason. When he has an issue with something, he usually talks to me about it. And he doesn't dwell on it for days on end. I don't know what the hell upset him so much that he's acting like this. I can't help but think that he's upset at me, specifically, since he rarely ever just... stops talking. And it honestly feels like he's avoiding me, but I really don't know why.
Worse yet, I don't have anyone to talk to right now. My roommate is curiously absent. I'm freaking out so badly that I even tried to call my best friend back home, but she didn't pick up. Fuck. I can't even concentrate on my homework anymore. I wish his phone weren't dead or turned off or whatever happened. Better yet, I wish he had responded to my fucking texts before his phone went M.I.A. :((
I realize that there might be a perfectly reasonable explanation for this... but things have been kind of weird for the two of us this past week. I don't want things to get even weirder.
...And right when I finished typing that, he texted me back. Apparently, his phone did die. What the fuck is happening. :(((
I stress out so much over this stupid guy. If it were anyone else on this campus, I wouldn't care nearly so much. :((
EDIT: Fuck. Fucking fuck. He and I have barely spoken the past couple days, and yet it seems that he's been studying with my roommate for a while now at the science quad. Which is the exact outcome that I've been trying to avoid for the past week because I'm a jealous, possessive whore and their newfound closeness is bothering me on all kinds of levels. As petty as this sounds, studying into the wee hours has always been something that DHB & I typically do together alone, and I feel like my roommate is taking that time away from me. I can't even go to my roommate to bitch about DHB anymore; it feels weird now that she's become friends with him. And since she herself is part of the problem now. Urghhjk. I get upset over the stupidest ass things. DHB makes another new friend and I get thrown off for a whole week. Fuck.
Blehh.
Why is life so hard. I wish I wasn't so insecure. :(
Though on a much brighter note, I turned in my off-campus study proposal today. Even though I'm somewhat apprehensive about leaving for a whole year, I feel like I *need* to do this. I feel like I'm at a stalemate, both with my friends as well as my classes. I want to grow while I'm away. I want for Senior year to be better, and I think the only way that will happen is if I'm the one who changes.
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In continuing her graphic-making awesomeness, Ritona Raito has posted a healthy-sized batch of *gorgeous* Lady Gaga icons on her World. They're preeeeeeeeeeetty~ :D
Unrelated, but I am now so incredibly excited for KH Birth by Sleep that I'm almost tempted to buy the import. Crazy talk, I know!!
Whew.
Just got done with Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, which has consumed my life this past week. My thoughts on the game in a little bit~ Though I will say that I enjoyed the game more than I expected to. :)
