Yesterday night, one of the best leaders of the world left us. Even though it was expevted because of his health, still it came as a big shock to the world. There will never be a leader like you! The world will miss you Nelson Mandela and never forget your sacrifice for your nation! May your soul rst in peace. We will miss you Nelson Mandela. I feel a little sad personaly because he was my favorite leader od this time...
Hey guys,
Can anyone just tell me why I'm so frustruated?! This frustruation is eating me from the inside. All day I've just been scowling at everything someone's said to me and I don't at all feel settled down. Man, my mind is going to expolde! I didn't have a good day either. I was horded with extra chores and my mom and dad keep bickering at me all day! Just complains on everything I did. I wasn't doing this right, I wasn't doing that right and just blah, blah, blah!!! I nearly got into a fight with my Dad but I watched myself in time...Now I act like I don't care about anything they say but it still hurts on the inside...Just Huff!!
Now that all this crap is out of my system I feel free...
Hey guys^^
As refering (wrong spelling, I guess) to my title, thinking alot is entirely too bad for me! I think that I'll do this and that here and there and thats it, I only think that and never get around to doing that!! I may be the loserest person on the planet this moment. Sometimes it doesn't work out the way I want it to and other times it doesn't work out at all. So, here we go, more de-motivation! And this refers to everything/anything I do! Sometimes I want to write everything thing here aand I think about what I'll write here but when I sit with the moniter and keyboard in front of me, I'm usually lost for words. It makes wallpaper, sometimes pretty good ones, but at times thay turn out so trashy that I feel like breaking the screen down, lol. And drawing, don't even ask me about it! I think my drawing instincts have gone to a long sleep! Same goes for writing! I used to write so much. I don't know where I've gone...
So, in short I can't wait to go to college! But see that's the thing! When I'll start going to college I'll be yearning for holidays. So that makes me wonder what happiness is for me....
I wish I could have studied psychology. lol. Then I'd know whats wrong with me :P
The decisions I took a while back have really crushed me. Things are better with my family but after that day I kicked all the intimacy with them out of the door. I wonder when I'll be able to live with that. Because I still can't. They ruined things with me that day. It was high time for them to understand me and when they didn't, it just broke my heart into a thousand pieces. And even though I'm trying to heal it, its really difficult sometimes.
OK, enough with the silly banter. lol...I wanted to thank you guys for all the hugs!! *Big, big hugs back* guys!! I'll try to post up some hugs too :)
Lol, I just feel so guilty for ranting
Hey guys^^
I wanted to post this yesterday but other things got in the way..As December has approached, I can't believe that the time has gone so fast. It still feels like yesterday when they were talking about the doomsday on the 22nd of December and now looks at us! Not only did we survive that day, we have managed to survive a full year from that day and now we're approaching 2014!
Its pretty amazing to me that time has flown so fast and I'll turn 20!!! Thats a big figure for me and I'll also begin my new life :) Its amazing, no matter what happens life goes on!
Wow, this year has been really adventerous. Firstly, I turned 19 and realised many new things with this age. This was an age where my family didn't know what to think of me. They talked about marriage and adult responsibilties but at the same time they became more protective and conscious of me. I discovered alot of changes in me too. I have learnt to compromise, to keep quiet, to let the silence resolve the situation and to let go and to smile no matter what!
Secondly, a few days after my birthday I joined TheO! Its was amazing when I joined. Mostly, I discovered people who were as much passionate about anime and art as me. They liked my worked and valued my being here. I made new friends and with them discovered a new world where there was no racism, no gender discrimination and where poeple accepted each other for who they were, not on the basis of their country or religion. And its been 10 months now and I'm just addicted to here, to you guys :)
Then in April I recognised a true yandere! It was pretty stressful. I had to leave tuition because of that..I won't go into details here but what I can say is that it was a new experience and I learnt not to trust jsut anyone that I met.
After that I had exams and those were good. Better than last year atleast and I cheated ALOT! But with them I finished High school. And looking back on High School I can say that I don't want to get back there, lol. I lost a few friends with High school too but I'll say that I won't miss them...
Then I had a few easy months. There was Ramadhan and I prayed alot, more then I have in my entire life. But immmediately after Ramadhan, I lost sight of my religion and that was totally new for me. I don't know, I follow my religion reluctantly now a days. I only pray to show my parents that I do pray but except for that I have totally given up on it. I don't when or how will I get back. Its quite sad for me that I have given it up and I don't know how to get back.
In October my mom had a major surgery and I took on all responsibilities at home. I learnt to cook and pretty much handle all household affairs and realised the fact that this is what my life is going to be after, maybe 4 to 5 years later and I had to deal with the fact that I'll have to kill all my interests to take on a family and care for them because taking on a house id really a very big job! I hope I'll love my family so much that I'll be happy to do these things for them, lol!
Then I got into college. I want to go there but I wanted to go to another university too. I came in 4th in the entry test of that university but I didn't go because I had paid for my college. I got depressed from that and nobody helped me except for you guys, or one particular person here. I so grateful to you! Now, I really want to go there, I'm looking forward to it^^
Then, only a few days ago I went through a total episode and again you guys stepped up to help me! And that made me realise who my true friends are. And that also made my learn that I musn't ever talk about things to my family, no matter what!
And now its December! And I'm making the best of it because its the last month of my freedom! And I'm writing all this now because I know I won't have time later preparing for college and all^^
So, thats it! tc all...
Loves,
Hifsa!
Heya Guys!! I'm Hell bored!!! T_T Minitokyo is not working well enough to open scans, internet won't stream animes properly and ;-; Guyyyyyyyyyssssssss......
Plus, my haircut!! I'm just standing in alot of light and my camera is crappy, lol...
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