I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!!!!
its so depressing!
i feel like i am hated everyway i go!
hurtful rumors were spread around about me before school got out, and i am scared to go back because of that

i am always in the house and very depresed and secluded
i dont know where to go when im like this!

there is some stuff im not proud of
i have cut myself before and i have thought about some scary stuff to do to myself
but ever since 8th grade i havent had that many CLOSE friends so there isnt that many people to confide my feelings into and ones that wont take what i said to them and use it as a rumor

haha i dont usually talk about stuff like this and when i do i start to bawl i dont like thinking about the mistakes i made in the past
so thats why i usually put on a face and just laugh it out and act as if nothing faises me... but it does i am one of the most sensitive people you could meet
and when i trust someone i feel so broken and betrayed when they turn against me
and well if you ask one of my friends when i figure out someone doesnt like me or hates me well... i break i start to cry i usually go cry to my boyfriend when he is around but otherwise i just grin and bear it or just cry in a corner in a fetal position :(

hehe sorry i really REALLY dont usually do this but i havent been able to talk to my mom or any friend about this stuff....