Chapter Four: C h o i c e s
The abuse continued--I knew that wouldn't change. Certainly, there are several other incidents, but I just became so accustomed to the abuse--I ignored it. I decided to shed no more tears--I had to fight my feelings. I couldn't let my pain please her, so I locked my emotions away, deep within my heart. I locked the door, and swallowed the key. No matter how hard you try to keep them bottled up, they'll eventually rise, and escape.
We decide to lead, or to follow--to be, or not to be. The choices we make everyday impact every life we've touched.
At four-years-old, I decided that this was all too much for me. I just couldn't take it anymore. I felt like I had no place in this world.
I ran away.
But I ran back.
I love my family very much. They love and care for me, no matter what I do. I know that they would never wish for anything to harm me. Even if they decided to have me stay at that daycare every weekday, they didn't intend for these horrible things to happen to me.
I had a place in this world, no matter what happened to me. There is a plan for me to fulfill, I can't quit.
Life is unexpected.
I was almost abducted in my own front yard.
"No" is a powerful word. If I didn't say no, I could have died.
If I had only said no to her.
After so many life-changing incidents happen to you, it's easy to lose your sense of reality--life can seem like a dream.
I just needed to wake up.
