Chapter One: D i s c o v e r
It was a sunny day in the fall of 1999.
My mom and I stepped into the house, and she talked to my daycare lady for a few moments. She seems like a nice old lady, I thought. My mother turned to leave, "Have a good day, little flea!" I replied with a quick "I love you, Mommy".
My smile faded, and I became shy. She introduced herself, and the other kids as well. I knew a few kids there already, so I played with them.
After about an hour or so, my daycare lady took me into a different room--a bedroom, and brought out a scale.
I've always been a little underweight, even at my current age of fifteen years--but at four years old? What's the point?
She ordered me to take off all my clothes.
"Why?" I pleaded.
"DO IT RIGHT NOW" She shouted.
I did as she commanded, and stepped on the scale.
"33.9 lbs--You need to gain A LOT of weight--My grandson (2-years-old) weighs more than you! Do you understand?"
Why? I'm fine!
What came next was not only unexpected, but the beginning of 7 torturous years.
A hand grazed across my right cheek.
Tears naturally followed, along with another smack on the right cheek.
"WHEN I ASK YOU A QUESTION, YOU ANSWER, UNDERSTAND?"
"Yea-"
Another smack--to my bottom.
"YOU REPLY YES, NOT YEAH OR YEP, UNDERSTAND?"
Fighting back tears I replied, "Y-yes."
"STOP THAT CRYING, OR I'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT, UNDERSTAND?"
"Y-Yes."
She grabbed my hand, and put me in a corner--a timeout--until lunch, which arrived 40 minutes later.
During that time, kids would sneak up and ask me why I wasn't with them--I tried to reply when she came over to me.
"Kids, go back to the playroom."
This isn't good.
She whispered, "You are NOT to communicate with the other children while here--got it?"
I nodded.
Glaring, she added, "And quit that nodding".
"Y-Yes."
Lunch finally came around, and she fed us this dish called "Goolash".
It tasted okay, but she kept forcing me to eat more and more--There weren't any other kids at the table!
A kid's stomach can only hold so much.
That thought crossed my mind right before my stomach could not take in anymore.
Despite the vomit on my plate, she urged me to continue.
I've had enough of this.
"I-I can't eat anymore!"
"EAT!"
Eating your own vomit, isn't that just DELICIOUS?
I sat in a timeout for another 20 minutes, then she dismissed me.
I was free to play with the other kids--
"If you tell ANYONE about this, you'll be in even more trouble" She threatened.
I let that thought flow to the back of my mind, and try to enjoy the rest of my day.
My mom finally arrived, and she asked how my day was.
"Mommy-" I began.
"She played with the other kids, and had a wonderful time."
That liar! I thought.
She winked.
What?
I tugged my mom, "Let's go home, Mommy!"
"All right, All right!" My mother smiled.
She winked again.
I've never met anyone like you before, you're a meanie!
"Goodbye!" She replied happily.
Why is she like this to me?
"How was your day, honey?" My mother asked.
"G-Good."
I wish I could tell you, Mommy.
"Let's go to the park!" She suggested.
"YEAH!"
I was free...for today.
