Ok, so am I the only one whose had relationship problems recently? OF COURSE NOT! And why are sooo many people having so much trouble making their relationships work, especially their romantic ones? Well, I have a theory…
Could it possibly that what we expect out of relationships is wrong? Could our generally accepted stereotypes be handicapping us? I mean, who wrote all these “dating rules” for us? For instance; who says that you can only hold hands if you’re dating? I hold my friends hands for many reasons; so we don’t get separated in crowds, because one or other of our hands is cold, or just to help them feel better on a bad day. Whether they are male or female, or whether I like them or not is irrelevant. But everyone assumes if I’m holding hands with a guy, that he is my boyfriends. Its incredibly annoying.
While we’re talking about generally accepted stereotypes, lets cover a few that really confuse me. Why is there this big rule about only dating one person at once? I mean, if you’re committed to one person, then what’s the difference between that and engagement? In my mind, dating is just seeing who you’re compatible with. I mean, back in the old days, when people courted, you could court, or be courted by as many people as you wanted to. When did we change that? I totally understand only having ONE husband, and ONE fiancé, but who wrote the one boyfriend rule? I honestly wouldn’t mind my BFs having other GFs at the same time as me, as long as they let me know. Just a simple “Yea, btw, I’m seeing so-and-so currently. But I’d really like to take you to dinner…” And I’d be happy, and all these stupid, petty little suspicions, dramas, and restrictions about not being able to be around people of the opposite gender while dating would be gone. The male friend would be ok again if people were just more open-minded and less clingy while dating. Do we really think being all needy like that and monopolizing someone’s time like that is attractive? Ew!
O, and where on earth did we get our ideas of group dynamics? Whenever I’m in a group with several girls and one guy, everyone assumes he’s either a pimp, or he’s gay. I’m like; REALLY! Why must we assume, especially the worst? Seriously, can’t people just be FRIENDS and have a good time without everyone getting all over them. Even if people DO assume, can’t they mind their OWN business? When did we get so rude as to stare, point, or constantly get on to our friends about petty rumors?
Ok, I’m going stop before I get more worked up, but seriously, there are sooooo many views of romance and relationships that are totally wrong. Me, and millions of girls like me get hurt because of these stupid little rules and preconceptions. It can’t be easy for men either, in a world where we think men are supposed to be all romantic and girls are just supposed to respond, never initiate. We need to seriously take a new look at how we think about dating, and very likely make some changes. This fantasy most of are in is just pitiful, and it needs to change.
