me: huh, i dont really have a crush on anyone, guess im just done with people playing me
me:
me: *hangs out with my friend brie and her roommates a bunch*
me: this is fun,, i am still kind of lonely but at least my friends keep me company
me earlier: *laying on brie's bed, watching minecraft videos while she does nursing work* this is,, nice
brie: *sits back so her shoulder is bumping my head*
me:
me:
me: ... :D
me:
me: *goes back to watching videos
me:
me:
me:
me: ... sh*t i think i like brie

//delete later

i cant even say if its a crush or not cause usually i have like, butterflies in my chest and that dumb kiddie head over heels feeling but i havent felt much of anything like that in months and months, for like anybody, even people i said i had a crush on in the recent past

plus shes attracted to masculine people and im not very masculine, and shes my friend. i like having her as a friend too much to screw it up. but the kind of friendship i have with her is basically the same kind of thing im looking for in a partner, and i do feel giddy inside thinking about how id feel if she was my girlfriend

"stop being so gay elricz ffs" k