THE Small FINALE

this world will also crumble.

let the room be filled by darkness
let me see and turn away from light
it's not my time to die yet
let me run away though tired
though tired i take every step
i can't give up ever i think
and my thoughts are correct
death must be defeated completely
the only thing stopping me is you
you're holding me back
intimidated and afraid of you
and you take a grasp at me
you smile and the fear covers me
and i wake up from this dream.

FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME

i want to bleed so badly right now
i can't find the way
i want to die
i want to be killed already
i want to dissappear
it feels like i want everything
but i only want one thing
a real smile no more fake ones
and i want to be released from this sickness

sometimes

I ask myself why bother?
yet for some reason people care about me
and i'm thinking am i good enough for someone to care about me?
no is the usual answer
i'm not the best me i can be.
yet my heart sinks for may lack of motivations
sometimes i don't care and i will tell it to you
i hold this dear to me
and when i realize i'm holding it i drop it
i run away from the pain i can cause myself
but somehow find myself back again
though i never get to bleed
i still get to fail the pain

my eyes

they close more and more as time runs out
i'm tired lost and confused but i'll keep going
nothing can stop me only death and i'm far from it
good luck isn't on my side but neither is bad
as i walk to my destination the fatigue takes over
me i can feel my hear beating and it's waiting
for it's final moments though i'm determined that
i will not die this time at least but the path darkens
and i dissapear from all of sight

goodbye

i was planning on saying bye to you
but instead you hurt me on the last moment
i hate me for this but
you asked for it and now
no words of mine are spoken to you
no more wasted time to you
you never understood who i was but
in that time i learned who you were
i learned everything and then
i knew when you started using me
that you really never liked my presence
that's why i'm not even saying goodbye
though i will attend your graduation and will see you in the future
i wish not to say goodbye for it is not needed for a user of me
you will never use me like this ever again and steal my happiness