Suicidal after Itachi's death: Fan FIc

“Silver-san are you ever going to come out of your room.” tobi asked. I lifted my head of the pillow and looked at the door. My eyes were red and puffy from crying so much. “I'll be out in a mintue Tobi-san.” I said sitting at the side of my bed and wiping away the last of my tears. “Okay.” he said. I heard him skip down the hallway. I sighed and went to my bathroom to wash my face, then went to and changed my clothes. After I finished, I stood at my door, not knowing if this was a good idea, but I opened my door,the light flooded into the dark room where I rest. I looked down each side of the hallway and finally went left after a close examination of it. I took my Ipod out and began listening to the Heavy metal rock that was on it. On the way to my destination, I passed a few of the members. None of them asked me how I was or if I would like some company. I was guessing it was because they could see by the expression on my face that I wasn't in the mood to talk. Right as was coming upon my destination, I told Tobi to go tell Pein to clear the lair immediately. He did and the lair was deserted in five minutes. Finally I had reached the door I was going to. The letters carved into the door and painted a navy and red said, “Itachi's Room. No one is aloud to enter or disturb me, except for Silver.” I ran my fingers over the words carved in the door. Hot tears come to my eyes, stinging them with paina nd sadness. I put my hand on the knob and turned it, opening the door and stepping into a room that was filled with a little light that shown from where I stood. I turned on the light, reavealing the navy blue walls covered with a Uchiha symbol, where Itachi once slept. It stillhad his scent. His bed was neatly down. I walked over to it and sat down. Something big,white,a nd fluffy caught my eye. I turned and looked at the pillows that were neatly placed together. Sittingopn those pillows, was I big white teddybear that was holding a silver rose and an envelope with my name on it. A few tears slid down my cheek as I took the bear in my hands. I opened the envelope. It was from Itachi. It read:
To my dearest Silver,
I know you are mad at me for leaving you all alone in this world, but this is what I had to do. Sasuke must know the truth and the onl;y way for him to find it out is for me to be out of the way. I am writing this letter in my final hours before I die. I just want you to know how much I love you and how much you mean to me. Take care of Kisame and Tobi for me. They can't do anything right. Be strong for me my love, your girls need you. Watch out for Sasuke and make sure he finds out the truth of our clan. Please forgive me for what I have done. Never forget me and listen to your brother. He may be mean and harsh to you, but that is just him showing he cares. I will see you on the other side.
Love you until I die
Itachi Uchiha
As I read the letter, tears went down my face, like a waterfall in the spring. I dropped the paper on the floor and hugged the bear tightly. I laid on the bed, curling up into a ball as I thought about all the memories of me and Itachi. “Itachi, I can't take this pain and suffering anymore. I can't live without you here.” I pleaded through my tears. I looked over at the nightstand that was right next to the bed. Sitting on top was a kunai. I grabbed it and put it to my wrist. “I'm sorry brother and Itachi, but I can't live without him be my side.” I said and sliut my wrist. I yelled out in pain and fell to the floor taking the picture of me and Itachi on our Wedding day with me. I waited to slowly bleed to death. An hour passed, I was almost gone. I saw Itachi waiting for me and the firey gates of hell. “Itachi.” I whispered as someone knocked down the door. I turned my head slowly towards to sound. Standing at the door was Sai. “Silver!” he said in shock but showing no emotion. “Sai, what are you doing here?” i asked weakly. He came rushing over to me. “I was just walking in the woods and found this place. I decided to check it out.” he said blushing. I nodded my head to tell him ok. I looked up at him and into his eyes, They were in pain ad were watery like he was about to cry. “Silver, what is love?” he asked trying to make sure his voice wasn't shaking with the sadness and the pain. I looked at him and thought. “To me love is what I feel for Itachi. For me it is protecting someone with your life. My heart is always wanting him near me, always wanting him to hold me. I am always sad when he is not with,but when he is I feel like the luckiest person in the world. But now that he's gone, it feels as though my heart has been broken into millions of pieces and won't be able to be put back together. Love is the strongest emotion that a person could feel, and it is the most hurtful thing to anyone.” I said weakly. “oh, well i better get you to the hospital.” he said picking me up. I still held onto the picture and the bear. I hung onto it, trying not to let him go, trying not to let my whole world come crashing down, and trying not to let my only love fall out my hands and into the gaps of my now spiraling out of control life.
The last thing I actually remember before the darkness took we was Sai's face. He was blushing and had tears going down his face. I felt him kiss my forehead and the darkness took me to a nightmare i thought I would never wake up from.
I woke up, I am thinking the next day, in the hospital with a bandage on my wrist and an ivy in my arm. I had heard Pein's voice talking to another guy, so I didn't open my eyes. "What are you doing here and what business do you have with my baby sister?" he asked someone. I opened an eyes to see who he was talking to. It was Sai. Sai couldn't say anything. All he could was stare up at him totally speechless. "Be alttile more greatful big brother to the one who saved my life. If he hadn't have come along and found me I wouldn't be in this bed alive, but in the ground dead." i whispered. Both of the guys looked at me. Pein came rushing to my side. "Baby sister you are awake. How are you feeling after last nights incident? I knew I should have stayed when Tobi told me that you said for everyone to clear out of the lair, but Konan said you would be fine and for me not to worry. Oh you can come in kid." Pein said looking over his shoulder to the door where Sai still stood. Sai looked up and walked into the room, stopping at the foot of my hospital bed. I smiled at him. "Pein could you leave the room please. I wish to speak to Sai-kun alone." I said sweetly. Pein looked at me, then to Sai, anmd back to me. He stood up and sighed. "Okay baby sister, but if you need anything jsut yell, okay." he said walking towards the door. I nodded and he walked out. Me and Sai stood in silence for awhile. "Sai please come and sit down. It would be more comfortable to sit than stand, right?" i said gesturing to the chair right next to my bed. Sai nodded and sat down. "I thank you for saving my life, even though I did not wish for it to be saved. I did what I did so I could be with Itachi. But anyways I thank you." I said smiling at him. "oh well it was no problem." he said blushing, unknowing that he did. "why do you do that? why do you blush anytime we are together?" I asked. sai looked shocked and confused at my questions. "What do you mean?" he asked, blushing again. I pointed. "See you jsut did it again. Why do you blush everytime we are together or everytime i tell you something?" I asked. sai touched his face and his blush grew redder. "I don't really know." he said. "About what you said last night, is that what this is all about? Are you in love with someone Sai?" I asked. He didn;t respond, but the way he looked at me, I could tell that he was. I smiled. "wow, emo sai is finally feeling something for someone. Come on Sai tell me, who are you in love with." i teased. he looked at me and sighed. "It's you." he murmured. "I am sorry i didn't get that. Can you repeat that nad speak louder." I said. "I am in love with YOU silver. There is this loud enough for you." he yelled. I stared at him in shock. Pein came rushing in. "Are you okay sis. I heard yelling." he said. I nodded and he went back out of the room. "Your in love. . . with me. How can that be possible? there is no way in hel you can be. no this can't be happening." I said. he stared at me in a loving caring look. His eyes sparkled. This can't be happening. Not now. Not after Itachi's death.I don't think I can love another like I did Itachi. Silver just calm down. You just got to let him down gently.I thought. "Sai I don't know what to say? I am just so shocked that you,of all people,are in love,and with me for that matter. I can't quite comprehend it just yet. Please just give me a moment to let it sink in or try to sink in." i said putting my head in my hands. Sai nodded and sat back waiting for my reply. I sighed heavily. "you don't have to feel the same way i feel about you, but I just want to know if you are okay with it. I mean maybe someday in the future, after this all clears up, you could give me a chance. I'll wait. I'll wait forever if I have to, I just want to see you happy, and not like this. You see last night, when I found you on the floor in your own blood, something broke inside me. I could see that loosing Itachi wasn't good for you. You wren't happy, I made me sad to see you hurt. Please never do that again." he said looking at me,tears in his eyes. I looked up from my hands. I can't believe how much i mean to him. He reminds me of Itachi. I thought. "Sai i am ok with you being in love with me,but I don't feel the same way. I am still not over Itachi yet. Maybe when i am i could give you a chance, but not now." I said and kissed his forehead, which made him blush. He nodded, and a little girl came running in the room. "Mommy,Mommy."she said. I smiled and picked her up. "Lily,darling what are you doing here?" i asked her. "Daddy brought us." she said as Shikamaru came into the room carrying Destiny. destiny smiled. "Momma." she said. My mouth dropped open. "She said her first word." I said. Shikamaru nodded and handed her to me. " Hi my little Dusty Star." I said and tickled her. She giggled.II laughed. "thank you shikamarufor taking care of them while i was away." i said looking at shikamaru. "NO problem. I could never say no to taking care of my own kids."he said.

To be continued. . .

End