In a philosopy class, a professor discusses about the existence of God...
Professor: Who can prove to me that God really exist, raise your hand and explain!
No one dared to raise a hand...
Then suddenly, a student stood up...
Student: I believe God exist, sir!
Professor: Really, Have you already talk to to Him?
Student: Uhmmm.... No.
Professor: Can you see Him?
Student: No!
Professor: Now! To see is to believe! Then how can you prove that God really exist?
Student: Sir, can I ask something first?
Professor: Uhmm.... Okey! Go on.
Student: Can you touch your brain?
Professor: No.
Student: Can you see your brain?
Professor: Definitely, No!
Student: (To the whole class) Classmates! Let us go home! Professor got no brain!
(^_^? Nice one! LOL!
What to do if you feel lazy at work??!
Don't leave.
Don't be late.
In your office table, open all the drawers. Pretend you are looking for something. A file, document, memo, note.
After looking in your drawers, go to your filing cabinet. Find some cockroaches there. If you found none, go to your incoming & outgoing tray. Look for papers left. No! Don't eat those papers! That's against good manners at office. If you're still craving to eat those papers, get the old (used) tissue papers you kept in your front drawer and wipe out your saliva. Then keep it again in your drawer. You can still use it tomorrow. Be economical!
If your boss suddenly came, Pick up immediately your phone then speak. Speak like the (imaginary) caller is looking for a folder. Say, "Oh! I am sorry but I'm about to
bring that to your station right away." Grab any of your folders then tell your boss with a smile to bring a folder to another station. Go out like you are hurrying.
Go to the toilet. Comb your hair. Retouch with your make-ups if you're a lady. Check if your underwear is properly worn. If your a boy, wash your face then count your pimples and white heads. Do it (or stay there) for about 5 minutes.
Go back to your station. Open your PC. Scan all of your drives and folders with anti-virus. While waiting for scanning, open another file... then another file.... and another one!!! Go to your cc-mail, check your inbox and look for unread messages. Read. Just read like you're a newbie in a kindergarten class.
After that, get your old reports. Stare to it like your examining molds in a bread. Examine what kind of paper was used. Count the characters, spaces, and words.
If the phone rings, answer it immediately. Don't let the caller end your conversation. Talk about some national issues, Hollywood, or the previous episodes/chapters of your favorite anime or manga.
Don't talk too long, an hour is enough. Your boss might get mad.
If you need to do & submit a report, finish it on exactly deadline hour. Encode 10 words per minute.
Check your reports and files you left unorganized. Fix them up while imagining like you're earning $50,000 every month. Don't finish fixing. Leave some reports to be fixed tomorrow.
Always go to the toilet. Act like your suffering from LBM. Also, visit other stations and departments. Talk about some Hollywood gossips.
Never look at your watch or clocks around the office. Let yourself enjoy with your laziness. You'll find out and get surprised, it's already time to leave & go home.
Go back to your station. Fix your things in your table like you accomplished so many works. Refresh your PC like you worked on it with so many sites & files the whole day.
Before you leave, go to the toilet. Look at the mirror and touch your face. Feel how you became useless and crap for the day. Ignore your officemates who were almost watching and observing your laziness for the whole day. They don't provide your salary, OK?
<Do this at your own risk>
(^_^?
