Guten Tag. It is customary for one to introduce themselves in this situation and in order to follow protocol, I shall introduce myself now. I have ordered and numbered important information that you may wish to know about me. Please read over it.
1. My name is Germany.
2. Ich spreche Deutsch.
I believe that is all the important information. I will serve to the best of my abilities.
...I have just been informed that photo identification is also required. Very well then.
This is Germany, ending transmission.
- Germany
Image from zerochan. All credit goes to the original artist. :)