This is a story from my big sister:
He was always there, always there drinking. And when he’s drunk we, my mom and I were just dolls for him to break. I was always there just outside on the porches or inside my room lending on a wall bending my knees just a bit up, as I stare into the floor like I was blind; while my mind takes in very many words, every noise I heard of her crys, her screams, the crashing of glasses-- the sound it make when broken, the chair been kicked, mostly of all, his yelling voice that make me shivered. The voice that make me imaged if I were there beside my mother, what would he do to me. Would dad hit me like mother? Every time dad was drunk, mother always tells me to go...to go anywhere that will keep me away from his sigh, away from him. I was always outside on the porches or inside my room listening; even the thunder would be more entertaining then this.
Mom was always there for me; even if she was a little late I would wait and believe she will come. But then one day she didn’t come. I was there, at school waiting outside the door but she didn’t come. Everyone was gone I was the only student left. I was 6 yrs then.
“a-ni, should we call home your mother is very late today” miss suzu nicely ask
“I can walk home” I slowly reply with no interest.
“You’re very small you can’t walk home alone” she gave a worry look
“it will be alright, my home is very near” mis suzu look like she got some extra plan right after school so I offer to walk home alone. Maybe she was really in a hurry to let me walk home, alone. In truth my home wasn’t near, it was about 2 mile and a half away maybe more.
KNOCK, KNOCK on one answer. i stand on my tip-toe and look inside. The living room is dark, there wasn't even a light from the bedroom. There was no place for me to go. I turn my back and lean on the wall below the window. Somehow I fell asleep out side. When I woke up I was inside my house on my little bed. “mama” I call as I got out of bed and head to the kitchen where I heard the sound of chopping meat. I walk into the view of my mother, “oh a-ni are you hungry, I made you 4 lunchboxes. Mm-this is not enough you’re need more then this” she said looking at the lunch boxes.
“mom I only need one for today”
“no’ she said smoothly “you need one for torrmorow, the next day and the next day” she said looking into the ceiling”
“oh, but…” my eyes wonders and came back to look at my mother,
“if you made them today it won’t be good to eat tomorrow”
“of course not, I made them with love for you. Since I won’t be able to make lunchboxes for you anymore” “why” I ask curious. She hesitate “ umm..i’m gonna work early morn to late night, that’s why”
“oh” I said kind of sad.
I open my eye all watery and was looking into the ceiling. it was a dream, mama. I was alerted and I quickly get up. I didn’t hear the sound of my mother cooking and the smell of her foods. The kitchen was empty, “ so you’re up” I quickly turn towards the voice, it was a man, a stranger.
“who..are you” I ask slowly without breathing, he laugh, “you sure are clueless, look like you’re not one of those little girl that know how to serve tea” I didn’t say anything I was standing there watching him “well go change I’ll take you to your mother”
