So...
Boring day like usual.
It was 2/3 dogs birthday today.
Maple and candy are now 2!
I got to school at the end of ROTC class.
Just in time to copy the first pages answers off the board and put away all my stuff before the ball rang.
Texted a tad during Biology.
Substitute, again.Seems like Mr. Sweaty Pits Morris is never there.
Did like none of my work.
Though I did some.
Lauren was talkative and distracting.
I hate her sometimes she can be so damn annoying.
On to lunch, boring.
Everyone at my table is super bitch in each owns special way now.
My cream soda fizzed on the table.
Melissa yelled at me because I asked if she could get napkins when she was up getting her lunch.
Everyone kept asking if it was beer. -_-
Sometimes I wish it were alcohol so I could be drunk and pass through the school day.
Because school sucks anyways.
I have no friends there, no friends anywhere in the world.
Yea that's pretty much it for lunch.
English, vocabulary test.
I forgot half the words.
So I probably flunked it.
Even though usually I'll get at most one wrong.
Fucking dumbass I am.
Copied down notes.
Borrrring.
Foods.
More notes.
Mrs. Dee kept getting in my fucking way.
Like usual when we take notes.
Leah was being annoying, "MRS. DEE CAN YOU MOVE!"
In her snobbyass preppy bitch voice.
No one even takes notes in that class, not really.
Maybe some people, I'm probably the best with it.
She was telling us how for beef, the cows and enclosed in a box.
And for veal, the baby calves are chained hanging up in a box.
I felt bad for the poor cows.
She told us how a parent called saying her daughter whos a senior was having nightmares from a movie they watched in class.
It's called "Meat Your Meat."
Jen's dad thought it was a porno she was getting a permission slip signed for. Hah..
Tells you how they get it and such...
I know Brittany would never be able to watch that.
Gym... I didn't feel like changing.
Had my story planned out.
"I forgot to bring another pair of pants from when I wore my home because of ROTC"
Though I had brought another pair of pants and pants to wear home last Thursday so I have two in there.
Oops.
Perfect since Mrs Holtsberg wasn't there so Mr. Vachon did both classes.
And they played racket ball or whatever which I despise.
So I sat on the floor and organized somewhat my backpack.
Blah....Went to BJ's for a couple things with my dad after school.
My sister is such a fucking little shit.
Came home, went online.
Like every fucking day.
Took a nap cuddling the birthday girls.
Got yelled at, bra snapped, leg slapped hard multiple times so I could wake up and stuff my face.
And people wonder why I hate being touched.
I'm sick of the pain with it, though it's fading numb.
But getting worse like before.
Which certianly doesn't fucking need to be.
My oh so loving mother dearest reminds me constantly.
I got ignored.
Which I probably should fucking get used to.
I predict it'll be happening a lot more now.
Maybe that message wasn't a good idea for me to have done.
Bad for me, good for them.
Oh well.. as long as someones happy.
It's a change from all the negative things.
Suicidal, depressing, negative things.
Just makes the ones in my mind more open to myself.
Instead of being preoccupied with other peoples.
Don't have to care about anyone else if there's no one there to care about.
I just feel like breaking down..
Hah, my old saying can come alive!
Nervous breakdown time, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind.
I don't know anymore.
Old habits want to break through
Don't know if I will.
Only time can tell...
But I want to see my blood drip and pool around.
Shower time...
