Now, I don't expect ANYONE to read this or comment. I just need to vent for a bit and I don't mind if no one reads it or anything. I have to let off some steam, though. Apparently it's not healthy to keep everything in? Yeah. If you want to skip over this there's a picture on the bottom. 8D
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I feel so damn inadequate. Y'know? I know I shouldn't feel like this, but I can't help it. I always feel so mediocre compared to everyone else. I get praise from people over the internet (it's REALLY appreciated), but in real life I barely get any. So what if I sound like a whiny, attention seeking snot? I just want, FOR ONCE, to get some form of a pat on the back from people around me.
I love my friends, I do. But sometimes I wish they wouldn't say things right in front of my face. I know it's not intentional, but really, guys. Have a little more consideration and don't say it as FRICKEN MUCH. They KNOW I draw, but they always praise one of my other friends. Which is cool. I mean, I praise her, too, she IS really good. But, DAMMIT. Why the hell do they have to compare me? And why do they have to say nothing about mine and everything about hers? And why do they have to say things like, "You're so good, *insert person's name here*. You should draw for the newspaper, they're looking for artists. Pass the salt, Tash." or "I think you're the best drawer I know. Right, Tash?" YES. THANK YOU FOR THAT SELF ESTEEM BLOW, GUYS. Just tell me I fricken SUCK already. God. Fucking whore monkies.
I'm never showing anyone pictures again if this keeps up. Dammit. I hate being compared. I hate how I will always be second rate. I wish I could be good at something. Anything. I wish my friends would consider my feelings for once and say it when I'm not there, at least. I could handle it at first, but every fucking dinner session, really now. It gets to me after a while.
Stop being so fucking condescending towards me.
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Not sure what's happening. 8D But there's a picture. <3
