Yeah so I'm a hypocrite P:
Can't be helped, I can't take it back.
So I've decided that I'm not going to ignore my feelings for Ian because I'm afraid. I told Ian that I think I love him too.

I was thinking about it and I realized that the reason I didn't want him to love me was because I didn't want to hurt him. Then I realized thats pretty much love is, isn't it? Its wanting to to be there for someone and protect them, even if its from yourself. I know we're young and I know we're not in love, but where we are now is special and comfortable and I know that right now, I don't want anyone else.

I know that 'right now' sounds shallow, but please hear me out. I believe that anyone can love as many people as many times as the fates allow, but we only get one chance at true love, that one person we spend our life with. Some people miss that chance, others ignore it, but everyone wants it.