I feel lik the whoole world is falling apart and its my responsibility to fix it, and I know I can't.
Why is it that the nicest people always face so much hardship? My friends are all the most beautiful people. They've all had hard lives. My one friend's mom is a heroine addict. Another one's dad is an alcohalic. Someone else's dad keeps having flashbacks to the time he served in the military. Another father almost died of a brain tumour and one did die, but from what, no one knows.
Is it because these people know hardship that they are so compassionate? Does one have to know pain to appreciate what they have?
And, excuse me for a moment, but who do I talk to when everyone I know has so much more to worry about? They all talk to me and when I need someone to talk I can't talk to my friends because they need me to be stable for them. Maybe thats not true, but its how I feel. They need an outlet, and I really want to help. But what if they're like me and if they know that I'm hurting, they won't tell me whats hurting them?
I'm really bad at asking for help, especially from people who have confided in me. I want to talk to someone, but usually I end up having rhetorical conversations with myself. I know what I want to say (or maybe I don't...), but I can't bring myself to say it.