My name is Samantha and I usually go by Sami. I'm a total dork, crazy and random. Yeah, I'm pretty awesome ^_~
Some facts about me:
My birthday is December 21, 1991.
My parents are divorced, and I just refer to my dad as Donnie. And sometimes my mom as Sherry, depends on if we're fighting or not.
I have a younger sister and an older sister. My younger sister used to have an account on theO but she has abandoned us XD
I live in Ohio.
I'm a Christian.
I've had problems with depression so occasionally things can get a little dark here. But I'm doing much better now.
I go to an AMAZING church. I can't get there very often, but I go whenever I can.
I do not have a boyfriend as of yet. But I'm in the market ;p
I am very random. VERY. Crazy and I love it. So be prepared ^^
I like to write fanfics and random stories. I have a fanfic on my other world and it will be finished eventually, I swear!! Just... Don't hold your breath, ne?
I love music.
I've been home schooled since the tenth grade and recently graduated high school.
I have a kitty named Artemis. He's my baby and he's what helped me through my depression the most.
I babysit and I like to talk about the baby and post pictures because while I may not have the "math gene" I definitely got a double dose of the "mothering gene."
My email is [email protected] if you want to email me. Please do, because I never get email. BUT ABSOLUTELY NO CHAIN MAIL!!!

I'm Back!

I am sooo sorry i haven't been posting! i hope i'm forgiven i've actually made myself a schedule of when to go online, so hopefully i'll be on a lot more often now. my therapist said i need a schedule because it keeps me from freaking out XD i'm not in therapy anymore, actually. we were getting into stuff that i'm just not ready to deal with yet (i.e. donnie) so i stopped going. when i'm ready to deal with it, i'll go back.
my cat's acting like he's starved for attention when i've been downstairs playing with him all day. he's laying by my feet and meowing all pitifully. silly artemis.

he's laying in my urahara hat -_-
i might be getting a tattoo. i want the words I promise on my wrist. it has to do with the very big thing that i told b-chan. okay, i'm just going to be honest with you guys, the very big thing is that i'm trying to stop cutting. i'm doing really good, it's been somehwere around 3 or 4 months since the last time i did it. so good for me.
changing the subject now, i finally got my halloween costume finished. i'm going to be L :D i shall post pictures eventually.
bad kitty! do not eat notebooks! -.- darn cat.
i do plan on posting the rest of Can't Spell Love Without L... eventually. not all of the chapters are written yet, but i'm working on it, i swear. i've got about *counts on fingers* 8 stories that i'm working on right now tohugh, i think. so yeah. eventually.
let's see, i think that's about it. hope everyone's doing good and that i'm forgiven for being a terrible blogger. and i promise to try to post tomorrow. try being the operative word there *sweatdrop*

Today's Random Thought: Don't interrupt me when I'm talking to myself.

finally posting

gosh i haven't posted in forever. a lot's been going on.
i'm on antidepressants now. they're helping a lot. at first they made me nauseous -.- i've never felt so sick in my life. but it's passed and they're helping now.
my grandpa had a seizure. but he's out of the hospital and doing great. my mom drove me up to see him yesterday. i haven't seen him in years, it was great. except that he still has that fat little spawn of satan dog o.o
i'm going to church again. went last week and after i calmed down i had fun ^^
i got a kitty! he's 2 and a half months old, his name is artemis. he's sleeping on a chair right now. lazy thing. i'll post pictures when they get developed. he's already spoiled and i've only had him 4 days XD he wants up on the computer desk with me and is whining for me to pick him up. he can get up here himself, i've seen him do it. lazy. any weird typing is his fault.
now the not so good. my small group leader on wednesday nights isn't going to be my leader anymore. her husband is teaching a new class and she's teaching it with him. plus they're changing up the groups so i don't know who i'm going to be with. i'm terrified.
aretemis is trying to help me type. i'm not appreciating it. well apparently he's starved for attentiopn so i'm going to go. i'll try to post again soon.

Today's Random Thought: WARNING. Children left unattended will be sold to the circus.

R.I.P. Curtis

you guys remember how my youth group was trying to get me to go to church camp? curtis geeseman, who was only my age, died there yesterday morning. they had this inflatable wrestling ring thing and he was playing with a friend. he went to jump on him and landed on his head. he got up and was okay, but then he passed out. an ambulence came to take him to the hospital. everyone thought he had just passed out and he would be okay. but he died yesterday at 1:30am. It was such a freak accident... nothing like this has ever happened before. camp was always safe. the year i went, there was a tornado coming straight for us. we prayed, and it swerved. but curtis died playing? I just don't understand. i wasn't there, i didn't even know him, and i'm so upset. when i heard last night on the news i was crying and couldn't stop shaking. he and his family were about to move back to texas... i just can't wrap my mind around it. if you pray, please keep his family in your prayers.

still here

just a quick post to let everyone know i'm still alive and whatnot. sorry i haven't been around much, more crap than usual going on. just had a "disagreement" with my best friend, so... yeah. there's that, the normal crap with my twisted family, i think i'm getting sick, and the stupid heat, so i'm pretty stressed right now. i'll try to start really posting again soon. normally i'd say when things calm down, but i don't see any sign of that happening soon.
and thanks to SaxGirl and TrinityLight for the comments on my last post, it meant a lot. *hugs you both*'

Today's Random Thought: I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?

i need a nap

this will probably be a depressing post. so read at your own risk.
i was up till like 3:30am. which sucks in and of itself, but the reason i was up was worse. i was thinking about donnie, which is never a good thing. luckily for me b-chan was up to so i was able to talk to her and not just lay there and be miserable. last night was the most upset i've been in a really long time, because thinking about donnie always reminds me that he never actually wanted me. my mom got pregnant with me before they were married. when she told him she was pregnant, he decided that he didn't want another kid, since he already had my half sister, and he ran off with another woman. another woman who had a freaking kid. he didn't want another kid, so he ran off with a woman who had one. makes perfect sense right? that's what really kills me. like, what, i wasn't good enough? it's not my fault he apparently didn't know how to use a condom. i can't even describe how horrible it is to know your own father didn't want you. i was a year old before my parents got married. and donnie didn't even want to marry my mom, he was cheating on her the whole time they were together. and then he wonders why i don't want anything to do with him. it's not like he cares anyway, the only reason he ever visited was because my grandpa got on his case about it. i don't know why my mom ever told me this, i would really rather not have known. i actually don't remember when she told me, she usually doesn't talk about him unless i ask but why would i have asked about that? it seems like the more i try to forget about him the more i remember. and none of it's good. i don't have a single good memory of him. just yelling and calling me names on purpose to make me cry. and then there's the not feeding me and my sister, and not taking care of us after the divorce when he had us for the weekend, and walking around by the freaking train tracks because he didn't bother to watch me, and freaking LEAVING ME IN THE TOY STORE IN SECOND GRADE. me and b-chan were actually trying to figure out if he should be in jail. because that was neglect, but apparently it's not bad enough for him to be arrested. neglect, verbal and emotional abuse... no wonder I'm in therapy.