This is a long post related to art and my classes. Ye be warned.
It's really hard to be mad at someone when they are so damn nice as a person. Perhaps on the professional level they anger and annoy you, but as a person, you think, this is a decent human being. It's what's making me be angry at my graphic design/illustration professor so difficult.
With the guy from last year on sabbatical, the whole Illustration department got turned around and we now have not two, but four people teaching across the program. Thankfully, I ended up with the one legit professor (the program only having two), so I don't feel cheated. I like this lady. Nice lady. Kim is her name. She is pleasant, calm, and helpful, which is so freaking appreciated.
My problem is that I don't think we'll ever see eye-to-eye on assignments. Now graphic design, that is such a "meh" class. It is boring as all get-out, at least for right now. I was having a hard time grasping the current project, and all she could say was that it's "working with pure design" and "well, you're not a designer, so it doesn't make sense to you". A little insulted? Yeah. But I think my response was semi-intelligent, being "Well, I'm just not used to this kind of design", which is pretty much the reason I dropped out of vis comm and became an illustration major in the first place.
That crap should subside within the next month, so we should be doing better and more fun things before long. Thankfully.
Illustration, on the other hand, is slowly grinding me down, and this is where we get the "not seeing each other" problem. Our first assignment was painting vegetables, which, if you know me, was such a tedious and tooth-grinding experince that I wish to never do it again. Except! Except one of my pictures turned out great and was a lot of fun to do: my marker piece. It was a genuine learning experience, trying to use markers to convey a still life, and I honestly thought they turned out great and were a triumph. The problem was getting there.
No, not getting to a finish. Getting to the start. I asked if I could do marker, and she flat-out told me, for the most part, no. No, because markers are not a "finished" medium. They are a comp tool. You know fashion designers? Fashion designers use markers to block out color. That so isn't finished work. And thusly, getting over that stigma is nigh impossible.
One of my friends in the class was present for the conversation and she said for me "Challenge accepted". So I accepted the challenge and knocked out a great piece. But even in critique, Kim said "This is your best, and not because of the medium". I know she meant that it was the best overall in terms of quality and composition, but come on. If that was my best and you were genuinely impressed by it, that means it was good despite being done in a medium you didn't think could look "finished".
Every medium looks and works differently. I don't think any one is better than the other. I have seen some amazing pencil work and some terrible oil paintings. It isn't the material, it's the way one decided to work with it. Hell, it isn't even the quality of the product - there are artists who work with Crayola things. It's all on you.
I'm not saying I'm a great marker artist. But on the same token, I want to be one, and if I can use them outside my comfort zone (coloring vegetables versus coloring a person), then that'll improve my skill and flexibility with them.
All I'm asking for is a chance.
Our next project is around the concept of "embrace". She said we could execute it any way we wanted, and I immediately thought "a comic, yes!" She even said we could!
Then I present my idea for a comic and she's all "derp no" and kind of going back on her word and saying we can't 'cause...we can't tell stories? So I'm guessing it was either a major misinterpretation on my part or AHHHHH
So I got it all narrowed down to just one scene that I'll be focusing on. Monday class was spent presenting our ideas, Wednesday was more sketch presenting. Pretty much all of us were thinking "Oh, and we can start this weekend and be along come next class!" Apparently not. She wants us to have final-final sketches, and all of us can't start until Monday because she has to approve them.
This is a maaaajor change from last year, when our prof basically would hear our idea and maybe some sketches and say "go with it". This is really apparent with me, because I changed my ideas all the frickin' time due to execution problems. Kim also likes to see color studies and stuff, which I really just can't do. I can't plan. I can't plan stories, and I can't plan pictures. I change things on the fly. And when it comes to painting, I just dive right in and tackle it, because that's how I get the best results. If I plan, I get stuck.
Also, I wanted to do marker again (in conjunction with some other mediums) and she went the long way to tell me no.
This is all a major hissyfit on my part. Honestly, my major frustration about not being able to start the project until Monday is because I am free this weekend and was going to art it up. Instead I'll be trying to do my entire drawing project, just to have it done and out of the way for illustration. In the real world, this is what happens. But at least in the real world I can cooperate 'cause I'm getting paid.
And it really sucks because I don't feel like she hates me. I feel like she hates me on a professional level, but personally, not.
