A long time ago, I made a post about...well, the post says it. Due to complications, my best friend had to live with me and my family for a few months. I said I would explain it some day. I've decided to do it.
Few people know the full story behind what happened, both in real life and on the internet. I dunno if anybody here stretches back far enough to remember when my friend was actually mentioned on myOtaku by name, but for the sake of it all, I'm going to call her L. (And no, not because of Death Note. >_>)
We became friends in sixth grade, due to an exchange like thus:
"Aha!"
"...You sound like a character from a video game."
"The Professor from Spyro 2?!"
"Yeah!"
I didn't know a lot about her, but as time went on, I learned that she was a fellow anime, manga, and videogame dork such as myself. But as things progressed, I learned of her odd home life. Her parents were divorced, and she lived with her dad and stepmom. Okay, that's not so odd. L often times did homework at school, was continuously talking about chores, and could never do anything spur-of-the-moment - everything had to be told of at least a day in advance. I didn't take too much heed to this (I was eleven, please).
During the school year, though, we had to do these "timelines" of our lives. One of the things we had to pinpoint was what we would call the happiest time of our life.
Hers? When her father won custody of her and her siblings.
We went on to seventh grade, and life became pretty neat. We did our thing and continued on as IDKBFF. By this point, L and I had had sleepovers and such, introducing one another to our families. At first, my parents were a little annoyed with her (eh, well, she's like me, so), but once I told my mom about her, and what the 'happiest moment of her life was', my mom was shocked. She's a teacher, and is used to these kinds of stories, but it's a little odd when it happens to your daughter's best friend, I suppose. From that moment on, my mom treated L like a daughter, buying her extra little things for her birthday and for Christmas. (Incidentally, our birthdays are eleven days apart.) That summer, we went on a band trip to Pennsylvania, and it was...amazing.
Eighth grade was when it all began. Her dad had been out of work for about a year or so, but they finally came to the point where they just couldn't afford anything. The bank was foreclosing on their house, and they had a month to get out of there.
This wasn't that far into the school year - they had to be out by the end of October. L called me one day and told me this. We broke down in tears. I just...I couldn't lose my best friend! She said that they were trying to find a house in-district, but chances were slim. After that call, I got on my knees and prayed. I prayed so hard...I didn't want her to leave. She was only my friend for two years, but we were just...the best of it.
And they did. They found a farmhouse to rent. Eighth grade life was saved. The year went on. That spring, we went to Six Flags for Music in the Parks, and had a grand ol' time. Eighth grade promotion hit, and we all went out to Culvers to celebrate.
Looking back on it, and from reading some old things, I've noticed that as middle school wore on, L's finances became more and more shaky. In the beginning, she was happy to loan out money to people, but by eighth, she spent less and we had to force money on her to buy things - like food.
High school came, and it was fantastic. Her dad had a job again, and they were planning on buying a house. L found her spark with music, and, with encouragement from our director, pursued it. It became her drive and her life, to the point where her parents helped her buy a French horn. Spring comes, they buy the house, and have a nice party to celebrate.
Sophomore year hits. Things become...strange. L's gotten a job, but suddenly, she has to pay for everything - even the car she and her sister shared (though later, we learned that despite paying for it, it wasn't...theirs). The band went on the New York trip that November, which L marathoned to fundraise her way. But slowly, I became more aware that something...wasn't right.
Her dad and stepmom smoked, drank, and took medication for anti-depression and sleep aid. Those who know the basics understand that these are not good combinations. Their moods become unpredictable ad their behaviors just...strange. There were times when they were happy, but when they were in their low, it wasn't worth making eye contact with them. The family had two pets - a young cat and a puppy. They found out the puppy had a problem with his knees, which would've required surgery but still meant a painful life. The cat...I...I have no idea what was up with the cat.
They euthanized them both. L wore a necklace that had the ashes of her pets in them. I felt terrible.
But times wore on. Summer hit again, and it was what it was. Then, something strange happened. The day before band camp, I got an e-mail from L that told me to tell the director she wasn't going to be there. A little while after I had gotten this message, she came on AIM, so I attacked her to find out what the hell was up. Music - band - was her lifeline, her passion. Why in the world would she be missing band camp?
Well, the answer was somewhere along the lines of her parents telling her older sister, who was about to go to college, that she had to get out. Like, leave. And so she did - and went to go live with their oldest sister, who lived by U of I. Now her parents were telling L and her younger brother (a year younger than us) that they had a choice. L wanted to leave - she was sick of the years of verbal abuse she had taken from them, so she was going to go and live with her mom. Hence, the reason she wouldn't be able to come to band camp.
I'm not sure what happened, but that Thursday (August 2nd...my birthday), L walked into the band room doors. I was never so happy to see her.
My mom and I took her out for breakfast on her birthday and goofed off. It was a fun day. But it wasn't quite...there. Before school started, something happened, and L called DCFS who, in turn, got the police over there. L and her brother were escorted from the house...to where, I don't remember.
I alerted my mom and director to this, who both sprang into action about what was going to be done. My mom has been telling L that if she ever wanted to run away from home, or if she ever needed a place to stay, we would be there. Our director said that if need be, he would take in her brother. My mom became a fighter for L and wanted to see that her father was brought to justice for the mental abuse he had caused.
Junior year began, and, just as it had ever since the beginning, life was normal. Winter break hit, and everything was pretty good.
And then...it happened.
I awoke one morning, a few days after the new year, to see an IM on the screen from L. It said something like: "I know you won't get this, but I have to tell you. I was kicked out of the house and I am currently living with my mom. I don't know what's going to become of me or my schooling. At this point, it looks like I'll be finishing the school year here". Distraught, I brought this to my mom's attention, who immediately leapt into action and called our director. I anxiously attempted to call L on her cell phone, but to no avail.
When she finally came online, I learned more: Her parents had really gone batshit insane. L was cleaning her room, and at the end of the day, when she was about to go to bed, they came in, dumped the contents of her closet on the floor, and told her that she couldn't sleep until she had cleaned it up. They also found out that she had bought a Tracfone, as they had limited what she could do with her other cell phone that was on their plan. Finally, she declared that she was leaving. They let her pack her clothes and essentials before being picked up by her mom. Her dad signed a note that gave her mom unofficial custody over L (and signed by a witness). But she couldn't take her French horn because they partially owned it.
After calls from all ends, it was agreed that L would live with us for an uncertain amount of time. With our director in on it, we easily got the school on our side and got them up to speed with the issue. After some documents were signed and made legal (or, well, they were made so that they could be officially presented in court), we finally got L to live in a stable household for the first time in a long while.
We had bad timing though...just one day left of our break...
It was all rather sudden, so for about two weeks, it was a constant sleepover. My room became our room. We woke up together, ate breakfast together, rode the bus to school, came home together, and hung out. She'd go to work and come home at night, where we'd chill out some more. Since my parents insured the cars and not the drivers, she could drive them no problem. Soon, we got a mattress, and my brother's old room (then my mom's yarn room) became L's room.
On the weekends, she would either spend time with her mom or go on crazy adventures with me. At dinner, we would be asked if we were going to go and do anything - something she found rather amazing. "I've...never been asked that" she would say with a giggle. If we wanted to do something at the drop of a hat, we could go - something that took her a while to get used to.
The really amusing thing about it all, though, was something L brought up within her first week of living with us. "Do you remember," she told me, "How, in middle school, we said we could live with each other for three days before kicking the other out on the street in a cardboard box?" Then we joked at how we had managed to surpass that number - by a lot.
It wasn't so much that my best friend was living with me; it was more like I had a sister. My mom joked at how L was the best kid to have - after all, she was potty trained, in school, and could drive. She wasn't a friend living with us, she was a member of our family.
In March, her mom announced that she had found a place to rent and that she and L could live together - in district. It was in a small township near the school, and the apartment was the first floor of a house. And so, after three months, L moved out at the end of spring break.
It's strange. The apartment is nice for what it is - spacious for the two of them. But given her mom's low finances, it's a rather depressing place to be. Well, it is depressing yet awesome at the same time. They have but four pieces of furniture: a lamp/magazine rack (that my mom bought for them), a bed, a rocking chair, and a dresser. L's computer sits on the boxes it came in, while their TV rests on the floor. They have food (L jokes on how they always have both ice cream and sherbet in the house) and all the things they need to cook with. They live a minimal lifestyle, so to say. But they are happy together.
Despite all the worries and woes, L's mom tells her to go out and have fun. I pop over there at every chance I get, and last week, her mom urged her out of the house, in which we went on a crazy crack endeavor.
On that winter day in sixth grade, while doing a review sheet in math class, never would I have guessed that the girl who sat next to me would turn out to be my best friend, who would shape my life in ways I never imagined. How was I to know that one day, my best friend would have lived with me?
Thank you for reading this.
