:VENTING:
I've decided I'll give a description of my dream about Savannah I had the other night:
Well, I'll explain it the best I can... I was sitting on the computer [like always] and apparently she had come over, but I was ignoring her and just sitting on the computer, she kept saying stuff trying to get my attention, but I was still ignoring her, and then she got mad and turned off the computer, so I looked up at her, and then she kissed me.
That's all I can remember about the dream, but I can't get it off my mind. All this is giving me a headache. :/
I wish I could just forget about it all,
I messed it up,
It's my fault,
so please,
just let me forget,
you keep coming up in my life,
people always ask me
"Hey, how's Savannah?"
well how should I know!?
Stop asking me.
Dammit,
I want to see you so bad,
but then again I don't.
When I do see you,
I'm happy, and I can't stop smiling,
but then once you leave, I just sit there and cry.
Why can't I just say no when you ask me to come over?
Why can't I stop myself from answering the phone when you call?
Why can't I stop myself from reading your pointless emails?
When you talk to me about that guy you like in your 4th period class,
I get jealous and I just want to tell you to shut up,
but you're not mine anymore,
so I have no place to say anything.
I thought I found someone I loved more than you,
but still even when I'm with her,
I still think of you.
What is it about you,
that drives me so fucking crazy?
Honestly.
It's funny how we met, huh?
My ex-girlfriend just walked up to you and stated insulting you out of nowhere,
And somehow we ended up sitting together at lunch on the same day.
I thought you were so cute, and you were so funny.
We had so much in common, yet still we were so different,
you started to change yourself to be more like me,
which I though made you seem even cuter for some reason.
I remember when you asked me to go to Alabama with you on vacation.
I was so happy, and on the car ride there, you had me cracking up so bad!
The truck was so small, and between me, your dad, you, and all our crap,
there was absolutely no room,
but I was so close to you that I didn't care.
It's funny, we both liked each other back then,
but we were both too shy to say it,
that was the best week of my life.
I miss when we would play the Silent Hill games and you would start screaming because it scared you that much, and you would beg me to kill whatever giant monster was coming to eat us. You were so cute.
Or when we would cuddle on your bed that was way too small for 2 people, but we made it work, and watch the first Pokemon movie and cry at the end because we got way too into the movie.
Or that time at the skate park when we kicked Chris off his board, and he got so mad at us. Then we kissed on the other side of the bowl where your mom and Perry couldn't see us, and we saw the E.T. babies! :D Those things were freaky.
Those are the moments I miss with you, and I wish I didn't screw it up, because I would love to have more moments like that with you. I know you'll never read this, so that's why I'm tying it. I just wish you would give me another chance. I promise I won't screw up again, and if I do, you can give up on me for good.
:/
UGH!!! LIFE SUCKS!
