“WITHOUT AIZEN”
To the tune of "La Vie Bohemme" (from the musical Rent).
I wrote this for the Otakon 2008 Masquerade, but plans fell through, so I'm entering it into the song challenge. Use it or sing it all you like, I left it as a multi-part song.
"CAST"
BYAKUYA
RUKIA
RENJI
One other (preferrably male) shinigami of choice
HITSUGAYA
YORUICHI
MOMO
MATSMOTO
One or two more shinigami of choice
ICHIGO
(STAGE LEFT: BYAKUYA is either sitting seiza (Japanese-style, on the knees) on the floor, or in a folding chair, looking smug. RUKIA walks in, as if physically in pain)
BYAKUYA
Who died?
RUKIA
My beau
(RENJI and S.1 pop in, STAGE LEFT, as if from nowhere)
RENJI & S.1
…Ichigo
RUKIA
I’m so sick, Of that dick
Who thinks he can trounce on us
That deathtrap of evil festering pus
The one who almost even took my own life!
Hueco Mundo, Hueco Mundo
Is where all of us will head!
This is true torture
The Seireitei is dead
(As RUKIA finishes, a solemn ‘funeral’ procession commences STAGE RIGHT, with HITSUGAYA leading on YORUICHI, MOMO, MATSUMOTO, and any other members of the ENSEMBLE (except ICHIGO). All heads are bowed. Two carry short wooden poles with white paper streamers, the rest carry large pieces of cardboard made to look like scripture)
HITSUGAYA
Dearly beloved, we gather here to say
Our goodbyes
HITSUGAYA
And hope he dies
No one knew the lies
This vile man played upon our eyes
On these nights when we mourn the death
In that little town of Karakura
We hope someday- And we sit and pray for-
Life without Aizen
ALL
Without Aizen
Without Aizen
Without Aizen
Without Aizen
(The phrase “Without Aizen” is repeated whenever “La Vie Boheme is spoken in the background while the lead character(s) sing)
HITSUGAYA
One time we lived peacefully,
Doing our work, saving people
From all evil, but we
Did not know,
Did not realize,
That there were traitors within
Fifth Division,
And several more!
(ICHIGO, looking worse for wear, comes stumbling in. Either his clothes are ripped, he is in Bankai form, or he has fake blood splattered on him. ALL ELSE on stage look shocked)
ICHIGO
I should have been dead, it was said
He’d make my blood run red,
Twenty-three pints I had bled,
But shonen comics never allow this,
Lost before the first kiss,
And, so, I walked away unscathed
But I’m still angry
He made me feel so hollow
Oh no- My power’s too low-
Level up, and then
I’ll take him on again
Thought me too weak, they had
Thanks Kubo, for no shojo
But can’t wait for life-
ALL
Without Aizen
Without Aizen
(The melancholy mood is dropped, and the scripture and poles used in the procession are discarded in jubilation)
RENJI
To Viz, and other anime companies
To Johnny, to Michelle
YORUICHI
…To hornets, cats, and bees
RENJI
To shikai, to Bankai, to fillers up the wazoo
To Bount and to Mod Souls and other things untrue
RUKIA
Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion,
Elation, Salvation
HITSUGAYA
Game’s out on the Playstation
MOMO
To Right Stuff, to imports, to Crunchy
When it's new
RENJI
To subbers
MATSUMOTO
No, dubbers!
ALL
To DVD R2
EXTRA SHINIGAMI
Endless fights that span ten episodes
MATSUMOTO
Transfer students…
ICHIGO
…Without prudence…
BYAKUYA
Samurai codes!
MOMO
To Youhna
YORUICHI
Takacha
MATSUMOTO
Shiro Sagisu, too
MOMO
Forever stuck in fillers, turns fans into killers
Same storyline again…
ALL
Without Aizen
ALL
Action heroes, Destruction Spheres, oh, Lackeys of Aizen,
Following ‘em, until we break ‘em, men,
HITSUGAYA and MATSUMOTO
Division Ten
ALL
Orange Range, Henshin change, teenage estrange
Nnoitra, Ulquiorra, Kurosaki
Zaraki Kenpachi
Unohana, Hitsugaya, Byakuya, never flee
To Kuchiki, and come fight me, Nine-Five-Three
To no shame- Ripped from the Dragonball game
(MATSUMOTO grabs RENJI, startling him and making him blush)
RENJI
To Matsumoto!
ALL
To Inoue
Kidnapped every day
To a safe rescue!
MATSUMOTO
Sake... Sake... Sake
ALL
Without Aizen
(With finality)
Without Aizen!
