welcome! i created this world so that i can post my own poems that are related to my life...hehehe

seasons of the heart

as i watch the seasons change before my very eyes
as i grow fond of dreaming about paradise
as i hear my heart's cries
all i can think is you standing there in my demise

right when i thought that you were there
you just left me in my despair
you just sat there like you didn't care
with all those fake smiles that you wear

now here i am walking
hearing the sound of raindrops falling
waiting for the church bell to ring
but only your voice reach my hearing

as i sat near the cold well
asking for my heart to come out from the place it dwells
as i feel the air sway
bringing back my memories day by day
and by now i can't really tell
if i'm going to heaven or to hell
because you are not here....

YOU

i was sitting at my chair
whistling in the air
asking God why life's unfair
i looked around and compare
that my life's nothing without you in there

in all the times that i cried
in all the tears that i dried
in all the sadness that i hide
it's all because you were there by my side

i was singing a song to myself
a sad song that seem to dwell
dwell in my hearts despair
you sat next to me
and you sang with me

and now the sad song
became a new song
a song that was too special
a song that i'll always treasure...

sacrifices made for a friend

i guess that all of us have our own story to tell, each story has hapy and sad endings, each story has something or must i say the writer's feelings...
so here it goes... the very first sacrifice that i made for my dearest friend...

MY LOSS... HER GAIN

we were talking under a palm tree inside the school campus, giggling, laughing, did not even care if what other people might say, we were too close together that in every foolishness that i got into, she's there with me... she has many suitors ( in her phone) and i guess some of the students envy her because she knows how to sing, in every competition that she enters i'm always there cheering her on... but what our classmates think, is that i can surpass her, they alwas tell me that i should step out of her shadow and show her who i am, but then, i know i can't, i don't want to leave her side, i don't want to betray her, i don't want to lose her trust, i don't want her to think that i'm better that her( and i always think that she's better than me, i guess)

she's my best friend how can i do that to her?... on our third year at our school i thought that all would be the same, but i guess not... she started to change and all of my classmates can see that, she became arrogant, and self centered but i didn't care as long as she's still my friend...

during that school year, i suddenly got close to this certain guy( actually a friend of mine, we have the same name but a different speling, and of course he's a guy, and i'm a grl then that proves that we are different), we got close because of the cellphone, and became instant friends, and i was happy because of that, then due to that i became close to his friend( i call him Aniki), Cass( my best friend( just a code name)) saw this and suddenly made her move, she wanted to be friends with them and asked for my help, of course waht do you think would be my answer? it's a yes of course.. i could'nt deny her coz she's my friend... all of our classmates realized that me and Cass are close to my Aniki, and they started teasing us, i wasn't affected but Cass was, feelings started to build in her heart and she told me that she likes my Aniki... well i couldn't do anything coz Aniki likes somebody else...

after our third grading examination..
me and my classmates decided to go to the mall and watch Twilight, unfortunately Cass couldn't come... i'm so sad coz my best friend was not there but it was her who told me to go.. we all had a great time together it was fun being with them( and how i wish that Cass was there), but time sure is fast, my classmates needs to go home already... but Aniki stayed with me, we went to the bookstore and read books, he was teasing me all the time so i turned my back at him,then it's quite a shock coz he hugged me and kissed my crown... i wasn't able to say anything, but we just resume to what we were doing( reading), after a few hours Aniki bade goodbye and guess what he kissed my cheeks...

Christmas..
i was spending my vacation with my family, and Cass was spending her holiday with her family too..Cass and i didn't have any communication at that time, but Aniki and i have, we texted each other then at one point he told me that he like me, but then stupid little heart of mine, i guess because of all of what happened feelings started to form in my heart, feelings for my Aniki....

classes resumed....
we were doing our project, a movie for our filipino class, we were shooting at tis resort, it was FEBRUARY 14 at that time Cass confessed to Aniki( my heart was torn into piesces when i knew this), and i didn't know about this until Aniki told me, he rejected her and told her that he likes somebody else( NOT ME), Cass kept this as a secret to me, she didn't even told me a thing...i was upset because of this, but i tried to understand her, for goodness sake she's still my best friend...
all of our classmates stopped teasing her and Aniki, and diverted the teasings to me and Aniki, i just didn't care a that time...

fourth year at our school...
i noticed a sudden change about her, she didn't say a word to me, she never even tried to greet me, anf for a whole week she just ignored me... i was a little bit depressed because of this, but Aniki stood by my side and comforted me... Gossips spread so fast, gossips that weren't true( but i wished they were), gossips about me beibg Aniki's special girl, but because of this i'm forced to choose between a one sided love, or my best friend...

i'm so stupid coz i chose my best friend, now i see her with my Aniki, smirking at me and told me it's your loss.. i sacrificed my own happiness for her sake, now i'm alone seeking refuge under a facade that is not me... smiling even thought deep inside i'm hurt, deep inside i want to cry, i want to turn back time and tell Aniki how i feel about him...

but i guess now isn't the right time, he still treats Cass as a friend and me as his Friend and as his little sis... i think this will be a fair fight.. i won't loose to her, and i won't use tricks against her coz she was once my best friend....

friendship

Hi! Konnichiwa!

I guess that my life now is a little bit sad and frustrating... my best friend has changed a lot.. she doesn't even looks at me when we are talking, then she always tell me that she's right, and its all my fault... but for one reason why i don't tell her about what i feel, it's just because i don't want to lose her... i don't want to lose my best friend...., i know that i'm becoming selfish, it's just because i don't want to lose anypne that is special to me... i always want to cry whenever she gets mad at me but i'm forcing back my tears and act as if I’m happy..g_blink:

(poem)

g_emo:broken bonds

at first i thoughr that you're my true friend
the one that would not pretend
the person that i thought was heaven sent
was the one who brought my world to an end

with this life that i'm living
with the friendship that i'm giving
just gave me to much sacrificing
now that i know that our friendship is ending

there's only one thing
that i want you to know
you're the friend
that i can't call my own.........

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