So I learned some facts about pandas. Though cute, they are among the most unintelligent animals on the planet, survival-wise. For example, their system is meant to handle meat. They are supposed to be carnivores, but they're vegetarians. As my friend puts it, "They're the hipsters of the animal world."
"Let's look at the facts here. A lot of conservationists argue that pandas are the victims of man's actions, that urbanisation and industrialisation is killing the precious bamboo they need to live.
Eh? Bamboo? They are bears, but they eat leaves. Hello, excuse me? Panda bear. Bear. You know, large, aggressive carnivore. Big teeth, claws. Grrrr. You're supposed to eat meat. What on earth is with the bamboo thing? A panda’s digestive system is still set up to digest meat. The reason they can only eat only one of the hundreds of different types of bamboo the world has to offer is that their guts aren’t supposed to break down bamboo. It’s elevating fussiness to the level of suicide. It's like me eating only car tyres and gravel and then asking for sympathy when I starve to death. Idiots."--http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jameskirkup/100010842/pandas-lets-just-eat-the-idiot-bears/
Not to mention, they won't "do the deed" to save their own species. Yeah, pandas actually don't tend to get "in the mood". Any other animal, without being told, will do what needs to be done to get pregnant and carry on the species. Not pandas.
"Then there’s sex. Pandas don’t like sex. All that weird, zoo-keeper stuff about putting two of them in a cage and seeing if they’ll mate. Honestly, an animal either wants to perpetuate its genes or it doesn’t. And the idiot-bears clearly have some species-wide death-wish."--http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jameskirkup/100010842/pandas-lets-just-eat-the-idiot-bears/
Apparently, when zookeepers need new baby pandas and want to get the pandas to do it, they have to get them in the mood by showing them videos of other pandas copulating. That's right, they basically use the equivalent of panda porn. Luckily, in the wild, their birth rate is somewhat higher than that., suggesting that they do badly in captivity. Still...
