Hey there! I am Fighter xaos though some call me.... *thunder crashes* Jerry. Anyway some of you may already know me as xaos.
I am chaos.
# it is a bottomless gulf where anything falls endlessly. This radically contrasts with the Earth that emerges from it to offer a stable ground.
# it is a place without any possible orientation, where anything falls in every direction.
# it is a space that separates, that divides: after the Earth and the Sky parted, Chaos remains between both of them
*“Chaos often breeds life, when order breeds habit”
*You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star.
*Chaos and Order are not enemies, only opposites.
*Out of chaos God made a world, and out of high passions comes a people.
Tomorrow I start college. I have three classes tomorrow.
At 9:30 I have printing technology
11:00 I have Gen. Psychology (however the start date for this class is different it says it starts 10/20/08)
2:00 I have intro to Graphic Lab (on Mondays and Wednesdays I have the same class but it's Lecture)
Oh! I also just got myself a freewebs, check it out http://www.freewebs.com/sentaihero/That's is I think. I think I'll enjoy my last day playing videogames or something.
So yeah I've been on a binge drawing Allysa and this is the song that started it. I love this song so much in the second attempt pic I put the Portuguese part of the lyrics up. It has a whole lot of energy and that made me think of her.
One thing though, I noticed that Allysa has now took over my portfolio! That's bad Linda would be very angry. She's my anime selves wife ya know?
I worked very hard on this pic and the thing that surprises me is that the dA version is MORE POPULAR THAN THEO VERSION! I never thought that would happen ever. I have such low expectations on dA. Also noticed that on theO version XAOS is on the corner there but the dA version I took it out. Allysa
Oh yeah, that's not even the news I wanted to mention. You ready? I GOT INTO COLLEGE NOW! I got accepted and got my schedule today. I'm going for a graphic arts program and almost every single one of my classes is just graphic arts, the only non computer class is Psychology, that's it. I also get three day weekend every week. I only go Monday to Thursday. I'm fairly happy I feel I should do well and that I should be pretty well off.
Oh yeah and thanks for the comments on both my mom's anniversary and my whole venting one. That one had 6 on my myO and 7 on theO but Dafeather commented on both... so 12 comments all together! (ha ha ha you're cool Caprisha) ^_^
I just heard this song this morning and I already like it. It relaxes me, reminds me of a time in my life when things were good. Back when I was still just a little kid. Reminds me of growing up in Connecticut and even a bit of Chicago too.
Thanks to those who saw my last post all both of you, literally. Oh and thank God you understood the post Caprisha, if you didn't I would've gotten more depressed and begin to question if I can even speak right. Yes, it was a message. See I hate to say how I feel out and out especially online so I like to put hints and stuff up, but most of the time people either don't notice or don't care. I just don't like saying out and out "I'm depressed I feel like crap" so I put up a song that pretty much says how I felt.
You know I've noticed I seem to feel I'm in a lot of ways like a character from Grand Theft Auto named Dwayne. If you choose to spare his life you can be friends and learn more about him. The way he feels and is now is how I am here. Once he ran a gang and owned a bunch of places and was a high roller now, no one seems to care (except you if you spared him) and he is living in a cheap apartment and all. Feels like how I am, before I was up there and people seemed to care and it looked like I may even get somewhere with my art. But now, I'm hmm how do you say... abandoned... ALMOST. There are still some of you that stick by Tommy and Caprisha thank you guys. The thing is not only do I feel hardly cares what I'm saying. "You all have love for a fool at the top and don't know a fool at the bottom. Out." But I also feel I just don't have it as an artist either. Well, the artist part is resolved I JUST DON'T CARE ANYMORE. If you don't like my style, tough. Some things I understand but most of the time I feel people are getting at me for what's just my style man. I want things to look a certain way and I was looking at other things, cartoons, namely Family Guy and The Simpsons and I was thinking "my stuff looks about the same" The stuff I was hearing was to do this extra bit or add more here and stuff. Ever thought I wanted to look like he's glowing? Or that I like the way the colors look? So just because it isn't what you're used to seeing it's automatically bad? I thought art could be anything. Of course I'm not saying I don't need critique that would be EXTREMELY ARROGANT of me. I'm saying think of the person's style first, how they want it to look, even if they don't say it look at it and think "how does this person want it to look like in their head"
Anything else? Ah, nobody reads this anymore... wait! Yeah, one more thing the people I'm talking about are those that just skip me over I'm not talking about you guys who are legitimately gone like you were on vacation or had internet troubles or what have you. I know because I always feel bad reading those and I always say "I'm not talking about you!" :(
Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow. http://www.4degreez.com/disorder/schizotypal.html
Thanks in advance.