hello hello, it is time for that sporadic update that I make every now and then! I wonder if there is a word for something more than sporadic, but not quite dead or gone? also have just realized i completely missed the whole of '16 here.... says a lot.
I will always think of the times I had here though. sometimes i'll just be going about my day and the O will pop into my brain! I even sometimes log in when feeling nostalgia, though the most I usually do is click through people's profiles, whether dead or alive. (and make a post every now / then)
after all, the otaku.com is where I first opened photoshop. it was the people here who pushed me to keep going, and I don't think it would be remiss to say that in the time I was active here was the time I learned the most and improved the fastest with photoshop and partially illustrator.
life? scary, terrifying, many big choices ahead. but always exciting and I know that i'm lucky to have these choices. it's just crunch time, crunch week now- degree show looms up close and terrifyingly exciting. looking back to like four posts ago, when I first started doing these yearly things, I talked of someone snowplowing into my life.
I don't want that anymore. not in the sense of being companions or important- but I never want to have my emotions be so dictated by the whims of one person, and looking back.... my god, that's embarrassing. I hope that when i read this post next time, I will have evolved and made what I hope are the right choices of a multitude of (equally) terrifying options.
also wow, rr of 2015, second year of uni? damn girl, if you aint optimistic!! though thankfully dear god, the last year of uni has been so so so good- better than both first years. I finally pulled my head out of the sand and I kinda regret not doing it earlier- i think i've missed out on some amazing potential. like... 3rd year feels that the money is finally worth it...
unfortunately a little too late, but I can only try to compensate where I can. I throw my mortarboard in the air on july 19- ironically my 22nd birthday (whoops, guess you know my age now lol). I hope that maybe all my dreaming and aspiration will have sorted themselves out. Or not... who knows?
for the one in the future, I hope you made the right choice for the one to come after you and for the ones who will cease to be. but never get hung up in the past. you made the choice- you are the one who's obligated to see it through!
closing this longer and more rambly and less grammatically-inclined post of the year with the reminder that I still read manga and anime and otakuness is still part of me, and will always be!
thank you for reading this if you are not me and made it this far.
signing off,
rr
