Now...I'm going to graduate soon. Wow and it feels great. Yet...to have a guy as a bf...I do not have...is it sad to me? Not really. More like funny...Even if I were asked to be someones girl...I would of said no. Why a "No"?
Well... stupid as it may sound... I'm thinking of one guy...I mean I can say I havea crush or this and that, but even so...this one guy pops up in my mind...even if these guys ask me and all...would I have really said yes? Maybe....but still this dude would probably never leave my mind...The guy I can actually say I fell in love with...the guy I can actually say I had that "love at first sight"
He was my best friend...laughed together, cried together hell we even competed against each other. We even made a promise..silly as we could of been but..this was serious...No matter what...if we ever lost contact to try and find each other again to be able to try and keep that friendship from dying. Me and that dork...my dork and I was his dork. Still a lost friend to me...and yet here I am..thinking of him....his name, his laugh, his smile, all that was him...to forget...I think is hard. He still lives in my mind and in my heart. I find it funny that we admitted to each other at the same time...and yet...I was moving...he made me do that promise...and yet, I believe he probably forgot, hell even moved on to a new girl and if he did it ok to me. Nothing big...more to a congrats and wish him happiness with the girl. Til we meet though...who knows if we will. How is it...I can forget friends...but this guy...I can always remember...I haven't forgotten. My past love...now it like...I want to be alone. On my own. Weird that guys have asked but I say no...I tell them the lies I think up...some I tell the truth. The lies? well...."I'm not the right girl there is better" or "I'm not the one you want, you can find many girls in this sea" but main thing I say...I just say how ugly I am. Up to this point...I'm waiting...for someone to say the right things...I mean it the right things. That and all Im thinking on is my art...my drawings...and my animations. I'm a wait...to find the one who can make me actually go on, and leave behind a past love I once had.