To know that no matter how much you try to cinvince me.....I am meant to die Let me explain this a bit In my life i don't give one damn about me My life means nothing to me I know a few people who know this I dont give one bit about my life I would sacrafice it on the spot for a loved one Somehow not even my art makes me want to live Its the people who make me feel i have to protect them The ones who I cant help but wonder how they will be The ones who feel they have no one else to turn to like me I have family sure but even then they are hard to rely on as well as friends Never know who will be the one to turn against you or make you seem like your worth nothing something you already know I worry for those of my friends who feel like the ones who said hi before are not replying to them Not paying them one bit of attention Not a hi nor a glimps Either way they want a reason to live I do not I already know I got nothing much on me I lack so much in my life but they somehow make me stick around The ones who make me feel like I want to be here to make sure their happy If their not i wont rest til they are happy May those who put them in the state they are in never cross my path I realised a few things I am one serious masacist I enjoy my own pain to the point if you stab me i will still come at you but not the point on that part I realised I dont really like the way things are going for me sure I should change em but im not even sure where to start on the other hand its better to not care for my own life My life means nothing end of that But in all the meaning to keep living for others is not me wanting to live Just for me to take their pain if they want me to. I wont let myself love myself since even i have the side of me that wishes me dead sure others have their problems and so i push mine aside mine mean nothing compared to the pain the people i care fors pain But in all I don't care for me I care for them as much as i get the your life is Important speech i still don't feel i have a life as some already pointed out to me and i just smile at them saying their right. I may not have a good life the best life but I rather see the life of friends go better in their favor instead of being trapped in pain all the time May they live a good one to the end