Welcome to Random Ramblings aka RR
here i post fic chapters pics and stuff
meanwhile Influx of Insanity is a world dedicated to getting out negative thoughts or goings on in my life so beware when visiting that one
Mood: amused
Song: Summer Nights
Pic: 
this chapter reflects real issues i was having
fanfic 30
~change was in the air at WT~
~it wasn't the scent of rain or of incense~
~it wasn't anything familiar to humans~
~but rfg18 smelled it and knew exactly what it was....~
rfg18: -breathes in deeply again- "today is going to be difficult God help me get through."
~as rfg18 anglsu and 21emz12 head to WT for work, ren feels the atmosphere change for the worse~
anglsu: "so is da da there already?"
21emz12: "she wasn't home." "her stuff was gone too!"
rfg18: ".........."
anglsu: *gasp* we were robbed?!"
21emz12: "but why only her stuff?"
~at WT on the front door~
~ren reads a note taped to the door~
anglsu: "hmmm this is weird...."
rfg18: "......time for another hostess...." -unlocks the door-
anglsu 21emz12: "huh?"
~rfg18 heads in and turns the lights on~
21emz12: "ren what do you men we need another hostess?"
anglsu: "ren!"
rfg18: -turns slowly around- -tears were in her eyes- "da da left. no warning."
anglsu 21emz12: "WHHAAAAT?!?!" -grabs note reading it in disbelief-
-if you're reading this then i'm already on the plane home....-
-tainted wings
anglsu: "why?"
21emz12: "ren?"
anglsu: "REN!"
~rfg18 was running off as as far as she could go and still be on land~
~on the beach she arrives frantically she calls tw's number~
[the number you have attempted to call is no longer in service please try again]
rfg18: "ngggh..." -rfg18 redials her number-
[the number you have attempted to call is no longer in service please try again]
rfg18: "unnh....." -redials one more time-
[the number you have attempted to call is no longer in service please try again]
~rfg18 tries email~
[the contact you have used has you blocked please use another or cancel]
rfg18: -tears stream down face- "DAMMIT!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!"
~rfg18 walks over to the boardwalk stairs and bashed her head against it~
~meanwhile emz and angel were almost there Hitsugi-san was called but couldn't leave right then~
rfg18: -cuts open her wrists and along her throat- -she smears her face with her blood-
anglsu: "!!" "REN!"
21emz12: "STOP!"
~emz and angel approach however rfg18 in her state of despair had turned wild, unable to recongnise
friend or foe~
rfg18: "hisss...."
21emz12: "that hiss again.."
-♪♫♪♫-
anglsu: "my phone!"
[anglsu: yeah?]
[Hitsugi-san: where are you?]
[anglsu: the beach! hurry!]
~Hitsugi-san arrives and hurries over~
Hitsugi-san: "fill me in."
anglsu: "Da-da left, no reason no warning!"
Hitsugi-san: "nothing?!"
21emz12: "nothing!"
anglsu: "we can't get near without her taking serious shots at us!"
21emz12: "we need Da-da back!"
anglsu: "she's gone though...!"
21emz12: "we need TBS!"
anglsu: "who?"
21emz12: "The Bone Snatcher aka bone-chan, TBS but she left too!"
~in a desperate attempt to stop rfg18 anglsu calls TBS~
21emz12: "she couldn't possibly...."
~despite the one in a million odds~ rfg18's phone rings~
21emz12: "h-hello?"
TBS: "emz?"
21emz12: "thank god! you know the beach near White Tigress?"
TBS: "who?"
21emz12: "the beach by the massage place get over there soon!"
anglsu: "whaa she's here?!"
TBS: "huh is someone there?"
21emz12: "come on!"
TBS: "well i'm near White Tigress so here i come!"
~TBS arrives~
Hitsugi-san: "how long were rfg18 and tw friends?"
TBS: "oh umm..... for at least 10 years..."
21emz12: "tw left and ren is devastated!"
TBS: "ah a new hostess?"
anglsu: "yes i'm anglsu."
TBS: "i'm the 3rd person who knows all about ren the other people being tw and ren herself." "so right
know she's dangerous to mess with." Σ( 00) "Hitsugi-san leave her alone!"
21emz12 anglsu: "they're in a relationship he's her..." -thumb held up- [BF]
TBS: "ahh...." (smile)
Hitsugi-san: "10 years huh? that's a long time, then to suddenly lose all that it meant, no wonder..."
TBS: "you should still not go near her..."
Hitsugi-san: "if i don't then she won't stop and she will never return to the person we all love and care
about."
TBS anglsu 21emz12: "be careful."
~slowly approaching Hitsugi-san gets closer~
~closer~
~closer~
Hitsugi-san: -thinks- her pupils are almost cat-like ~moves in~
Hitsugi-san: "i'm here." "you're going to be alright."
rfg18: -stares-
Hitsugi-san: "now then let's take you home and clean you---" "!?"
~rfg18 had raked her nails over his left shoulder at a unbelieveable speed~
Hitsugi-san: ".........." "ah!"
anglsu 21emz12: "Hitsugi-san!!"
TBS: "her trust is just about gone." "Hitsugi-san i think you should let her go."
Hitsugi-san: "i can't"
TBS: "she's going to hurt you more if you don't!"
Hitsugi-san: "if i let go then it means i gave up on her, so if a few cuts on me will resolve this than that's
fine!"
Hitsugi-san: "i'm here." "you're going to be alright."
~another clawing over his left shoulder~
rfg18: "let go for your own sake."
21emz12: "that didn't sound like her at all..." -shivers-
anglsu: "her voice was so cold and merciless...!"
Hitsugi-san: "i'm here." "you're going to be alright."
rfg18: "let go."
Hitsugi-san: "NO!! i won't give up on you!"
rfg18: -grips his shoulder- "let me go."
Hitsugi-san: "NO!"
rfg18: -claws with serious force-
Hitsugi-san: "ahhh!"
~at that second Hitsugi-san saw that her pupils had returned to normal rfg18 fainted and Hitsugi-san's
left shoulder was bleeding considerably~
~TBS drove everyone to WT where truths be told~
Haiku Hints -preview-
issues reopened
ren has even more to do
unlock her life story
finally i have unsubscribed from tainted wings
i didn't care if her worlds were private
PMversations and COMMENTversations would have been plenty
but with none of those happening
why?
why keep living in this happy-lie dream world this is the relm of children
might as well go back to this sad-truth reality world
i'm a person with such an unbelieveable conflicted nature:
over my life i've suffered loneliness from having less than 5 friends throughout my entire life
but at some point i started to care less
and less
and less
and now i'm a loner who would rather have contact with my pets than with people
a loner who has asperger's who ever so slightly sometimes might want human friendship
but who's shyness and quiet nature prevent that from happening
with emotional damage from loss several times but was never offered counseling or therapy [earliest loss was suffered at 12 or so]
from bein called names and spanking so no self esteem
my sister and brother who fight worse than cats and dogs these parents of mine who still argue even after divorce so i hate loud noise
add on a lack of physical parental nurturing [i.e. hugs]
and i am unaccustomed to being touched and just about dislikes being touched
back to the shyness and quiet nature
i don't think i ever have blushed i don't lol LMAO or even laugh in public hardly at all
i was tickled in public and was embarassed
i lol'd in public and was embarassed
i hated it when both happened cause my reputation and image were obliterated
i don't like showing emotions
so i strive to keep them locked up
i cried in school twice
when i watched tuesdays with morrie
it sparked a flashback to the day my grandmother suddenly died the one memory that i have of that day was her in the casket and all the sadness came rushing back
then when i was taking my final exam in algebra
i was worried that i'd fail it fail algebra not graduate
i was already failing algebra anyway [with my serious math learning disability]
put all this with what other stuff i've said in INS and OUTS and you have me
my fanfic is made of truths modified truths and fiction
much about rfg18 and me; since that is my character are the same
