Hi I'm Dranzerstorm
You may remember me as a regular contestant on the caption battle contest.
Welcome to Retro Retrospective, my world dedicated to the old guard of the Otaku world; expect some reviews of the old & obscure, and in-depth geeky knowledge with the occasional top ten and I now have a logo.

Little info about me
Well I'm British and I'm in to all things animated and nostalgia.
I've grown up with every cartoon going and have watched hundreds of anime.
Oh and to answer a question I was asked once, no I don't wear glasses in real life, I would wear Loke's sunglasses though.

Cartoon Vault: Pole Position

Post 28 and a good reason why you shouldn't lend your video game franchise to a cartoon maker in the 80s.

Pole Position is often regarded as the pioneer of the racing game, not the first racing game by any stretch but certainly the title was the one that started the ball rolling proper, but around the 80s, cartoon makers seemingly out of ideas turned to video games in order to see if their impact on computers can work as tv shows, however there was so little to go on in narrative that most of them were dreadful, and had to dredge up older already well used tropes at the time such as Scooby Doo style mysteries and 50s style in what was modern day setting, think Happy Days.
Pole Position didn't fair any better by becoming a spy show but at least in their favor it felt current to the time period as the cars borrowed elements from Knight Rider, so what's the story?
Tess and Dan Darrett have inherited the job of crime fighters from their deceased parents and must use their super machines Wheels and Roadie to stop all evil in the world, where the title comes in, Pole Position is the name of their cover as Stuntmen, so yeah no relation to the games other than the car colors matching the main cars in the games but other than that it's surprising Namco let this slide or Knight Rider for that matter as the talking computers in the cars are ripped off from that.
As far as stories go, it's a generous mix of fairly decent, cheesy, ludacrous and seen it all before, so yeah it's not exactly ground breaking but it's at least better than a good portion of the 80s Video Games cartoons everyone had to sit through, but it's still so ridiculously 80s that it hasn't aged particularly well so if your watching it now, take it with a pinch of salt. Awesome theme song though.

Cartoon Vault: My Little Pony the Movie

Okay so Shojo week hasn't developed a single good show so far, but don't feel that I hate the genre entirely, let me dig up something which I watched as a kid and found not so bad. It's My Little Pony the Movie.

Were going back to Generation 1 My Little Pony with this film, back during the whimsical days of the 1980s.
Baby Lickety-Split is practicing her dance moves with Spike on piano but her performance upsets the other ponies when she messes up which ends in her running away, elsewhere Hydia and her two daughters plot to unleash a purple sludge creature called the Smooze which predates the Pokemon Grimer and Muk by a good ten years.
Anyway, Hydia succeeds in unleashing the Smooze which engulfs all of the land including Dream Castle, even the Rainbow of Light controlled by gaudy dressed human Megan is no match for the Smooze.
In a desperate bid to stop the Smooze, a group of Ponies along with Megan and her Siblings go and seek the Flutter Ponies who have the powers to stop the Smooze, along the way they meet some well spirited trolls called Grundles in one of Danny Devito's most forgettable moments in acting along with some perils and meeting the eccentric wizard Moochick. When they find the Flutter Ponies they initially decline to help until Baby Lickety-Split changes their mind after helping one of their kind. The Flutter Ponies make quick work of the Smooze and save the Pony lands.
This film is not that bad, compared to other cartoon films around the same time including Care Bears it's probably one of the better ones but only because you actually have decent acting in it and that makes a lot of it worth while, sure it has it's faults namely the lack of development in the human characters and why the Grundles needed to be in it at all but because of it's nostalgic feel and a story that encourages cheesiness and fun over complexity it actually comes across as good and even though the latest My Little Pony trounces anything the other generations ever did, those who remembered the first generation still feel like Squeeing when the old theme song starts up.
See, something I like that's girly. You'll get another in a couple of hours to make up for missing Friday's post.

Creamy Mami Review

Writer's block has been annoying me lately so lets dig up a theme to use this week as I bring you Shojo Week; every show reviewed this week is aimed at a female audience with a mixture of pink, fluffy and more grown up works. Not all of the shows will be anime and not all of them will be good so sit back and enjoy as we start off with Magical Angel Creamy Mami.

Ten year old Yu Morisawa was just an ordinary girl until she discovers a spaceship, after helping the friendly alien, she is granted a magical wand which allows her to transform into a sixteen year old at any time for one year.
However when she enters the public eye in her sixteen year old form she gets scouted to become an idol singer, now Yu under the stage name Creamy Mami must endure the ups and downs of being an idol while trying to keep her magic a secret from her suspicious friends.
The premise of this show sounds exciting, Akemi Takada's designs along with her art books are beautiful and really bring to life the maturity and grace hidden inside Mami and this was well before Barbie dolls covered the entire girls spectrum of interests and well before Disney Princess was a franchise. So why is this 32 year old franchise so boring?
Well the industry itself is boring, as exciting as being an idol singer is, the so called ups and downs get swept up in all the politics with all the secondary characters within the show often leaving Mami as a plot device rather than a lead character as her actions move the story but aren't always centered around her, this is why Idol Densetsu Eriko is even worst than this and why this show isn't more celebrated today, it didn't help that Studio Pierrot made so many of these shows in the 80s that there wasn't even an alternative to choose from. It's a shame it had to be this way, especially with such a good artist on board but nothing about this show other than the concept is memorable as it's been done by better anime.
There's no dub, in fact the only American release quickly finished and discontinued without a trace; there's a wide release in several European countries especially Italy who love Shojo shows.
Final Verdict: A well designed anime that's too boring to be remembered in the modern age.

Tribute List: The Do's & Don't's of Remakes

It has been brought to my attention that this series is going to be remade or at least the creator is thinking about it.

From the interviews I've read online, there's a lot that can go wrong with a remake of a show like the Raccoons but there are ways that it can go right, so this tribute list will examine the Do's and Don't's of remakes for this show and examples of others that got it right or wrong.

Don't Rely on CGI as a First Choice
The most popular cartoons at the moment don't actually use it and even returning franchises like Looney Tunes and Tom & Jerry have managed to avoid it but shows like Garfield have a hard time grabbing an audience when that went to CGI because it lacks the slapstick that the original show had, only a non dialogue cartoon like Wil.E Coyote & Road Runner can pull this off successfully.

Do Keep the Formula that Made the Original Famous
It's not difficult to keep formulas for cartoons, heck if Scooby Doo can keep going with their formula then what's to say other cartoons can't. The Raccoons wouldn't work without the insert songs or it's main theme.

Don't Rely too much on Modern Technology
If you remade something that today hasn't aged well then you probably should leave it alone, Jem and the Holograms made the fatal mistake of jumping on the social media bandwagon to plug their live action reboot movie, which has turned a cheesy yet charming 80s cartoon into another horrific Nickelodeon style live action tween movie.

Do Pick a Vocal Cast that can Bring back the Characters Properly
A sad reality about cartoons is that while they live as long as they're remembered, their voice actors won't, they are still human and will have to depart this world eventually; a sad truth particularly with Raccoons is most of their main voice cast have passed away. To better explain what I mean. Mickey Mouse has had 10 Voice Actors since his creation and no one has ever questioned the quality of his voice, so voice acting isn't an issue.

Don't Dramatically Change Character Designs or Change their Gender just Because Some Network Told you so
My biggest complaint about the remake of Thunderbirds and what I'm reading about the Danger Mouse remake as well is the dramatic change in certain characters. When you make a character for any TV show it should remain in that form for it's existence. Art Direction for characters is subjective and reasonable but turning a character who was previously male into female like Lieutenant Green in Captain Scarlet or changing an iconic looking character into something unrecognizable like turning Yogi Bear into an early 90s teenager is not right.

Do Fix the bits that were Broken with the Original
Fans are easily narked off about changes to their precious cartoons but there are some things that everyone will agree with. Try telling me these ideas were bad?
Thundercats Remake: Snarf doesn't talk.
Modern Scooby Doo: Scrappy Doo doesn't exist in Canon.
My Little Pony: It's not Generation 3.
Small examples but you can see my point.

Don't Let a New Character Take the Lead
Optimus Prime should always lead the Transformers not Bumblebee. Scooby Doo is called Scooby Doo not the lets watch an awkward relationship between Fred and Daphne Show. Tom & Jerry is about a cat and mouse fighting each other, not a supporting player to a character that no one cares about. You can see where I'm going with this, no more needs to be said.

Do Pay Tributes to the Original Source Material
You'll be doing yourself and your original fans so many favors that you'll quickly forget that it's a remake.

Don't Insult the Fans of the Original by Creating a New Product from the Old
Jem and the Holograms example again, there's nothing in that live action film that has anything whatsoever to do with the original, it shouldn't even be allowed the tagline Holograms. Micheal Bay Ninja Turtles and All Female Ghostbusters springs to mind as well.

Do Keep the Iconic Theme Songs, if you can't, Make a New Iconic Theme Song
Fans will always identify a cartoon by it's iconic theme and keeping the theme song is essential for that, if it cannot be done due to copyright or some rubbish like that, then make something that does the same job.

and finally

Don't Ever, Ever Remake Anything that Hasn't had enough Spotlight to Justify a Return
The Kickstarter trend is notorious for this in bringing back something that hasn't seen the light of day for years and then some clever sod decides it should come back and actually remakes it which I guess is the story surrounding the Rainbow Brite reboot. I'm not sure how much in demand the Raccoons is in it's native Canada, I imagine a certain Canadian I know can answer that for me but for other examples like Rainbow Brite and Jem and the Holograms, there are so few people wanting those shows back that in actually doing it you've pretty much tripped before you've started. It's also not a good idea to remake something that hasn't been relevant for 20 years, five years is the longest any cartoon should wait for a reboot, it's still relevant and will be more accepted as some of the fans are still around and you have more options to tweak it. Wait too long and your stuck with a current Generation who'll spend more time asking their parents why they are so interested in their cartoons or why your so angry at something your kid clearly enjoys, or my favorite one, telling off your kid for liking a new version of a cartoon you enjoyed. Yes that really happens.

So you probably have some clear understanding of why the Raccoons reboot doesn't work and why certain other shows do or don't work.

Circuit Angel Review

A-Z Review season is over and were back to regular old reviewing so lets celebrate by reviewing a crappy OVA from the 1980s, Circuit Angel.

Circuit Angel tells the story of Mariko, a rebellious school girl with a love for motorcycles. Unfortunately this passion draws her into a race against a jerkass rich boy who won't leave Mariko alone because she is connected to some former bike racer who accidentally killed someone, and also because he wants to prove to his father that the rider is the one who decides the outcome and not the machine.
This OVA is horrible, it constantly wastes so much time trying to set up the big race at the end that it fails to properly introduce the characters and give us any reason to support them. Mariko seems to follow a strict template for female characters in the 80s and early 90s but you get the feeling she was destined for a better anime; equally I think that it was also meant to be more adult, the so called flashback Raita has about the accident is poorly choreographed as the person who died has such a wussy crash that the guy must've been made of glass, and this was the ultra violent anime era so no excuses really, although you still get some nudity for backup.
It's not that difficult to make motorsports anime look awesome especially the likes of Initial D and over the top karting anime Capeta. I think the main issue with Circuit Angel is that they draw the bikes better than the rest of the anime.
Final Verdict: It's crap; a poorly structured story performed by a cast of bland characters set in an era that should've given it more to work with. Give it a miss, which is very easy because it's not available in the west, only online on Youtube.