[Be warned, it's gonna be another semi-long post..]
Hello everyone! It's been a while, hasn't it? I'm sorry that I left for a while; I have been so busy with school! >.<
Before I begin, I wanted to give my thanks to ItachiSasuke and StarsSmile especially for your really thoughtful comments on my last post from a while back. I'm grateful for everyone's thoughtful responses, but you two in particular really helped turn my day around, so thank you so much!
But in any case...so there's a couple of things I need to catch you guys up on(or get off my chest..not sure which of the two it is xD).
First is that last Friday, I went to a nursing home with several of my friends from Singer-Songwriter-Society(a musical group I'm in) to perform some solo pieces/sing some Christmas carols, and it was FANTASTIC! That was my first time singing while playing at the same time, so it was a frighteningly new experience for me, but I tried it and all turned out well. ^^
Second, I've been hanging out with a lot of friends quite often. My fellow classmates in Japanese class, in particular, are the people I've been spending time with most. I'm REALLY grateful to have them as friends because I certainly did not have such a great group of people around me in all of my years of high school and middle school. Sure, I'd be friends with them, but I never really felt like I fit in with them and I'm just glad that I've found some people that I can truly be with without any doubts.
That kinda brings me to my problem xD (which isn't really that big of a problem, but in a way it kinda is...?)
It might sound really whiny and pathetic(at least, in my opinion it does..), but nowadays, because I have such wonderful friends, it is SO easy for me to feel lonely when I'm not with anyone. I never had that problem in high school, but perhaps that's just because I didn't feel very connected to the people I knew at school (which sounds really terrible, but in a way it's kind of true).
In any case, so today was the last day I'd get to see my friends in Japanese class before break(we had our final exam today), and I just became REALLY sad all of a sudden. I'm kind of wondering if I'm just being kinda selfish again for wanting to be with them still? Or maybe it's just me wanting to socialize more...? I don't know, it's really strange and I'm kind of feeling pathetic for becoming lonely so easily haha.
Speaking of feelings, have you ever had one of those moments where you liked someone, but you didn't WANT to like them because it'd be opening a bad door?
Yeah...well I'm kind of having that issue right now haha. Race and job/interest preference is such a BIG thing with my parents, I feel like even if it did work out just between us two, it would NEVER work with my parents.
Wow okay this is sounding really cheesy, I'm gonna stop this part of my rant haha.
Basically, this person is an interest I probably should not pursue. Especially since I'm pretty sure he likes my friend. xD
On a completely different note, I can't believe I only have a little more than 10 days to finish like 3 drawings! LOL I really have a lot that I need to do @__@ especially with finals still happening this week.
But all in all, I guess all anyone can really do is just work hard and hope for the best. >.< I feel like I'm a total wreck right now haha.
To anyone that is still taking finals, good luck!~ There's only a little more left to do until the holidays ^^
And to everyone else who is either still in school or already on break, I wish you all the best!~
Take care everyone~! And thanks for putting up with me xD
