*Sighs* I am so utterly selfish... My sister and a friend of hers have been in a fight for the longest time... they always fought, but never like this... so today, they started talking again, started laughing again, and things were back to the way they were... well it seems anyway... and I was left alone... I was always left alone when they were friends, and I would just smile, and pretend I didn't mind. But today... I loved being with my sister at all times, we were inseparable... and suddenly it's back to me being the outcast... so I don't like that they're acting like friends and leaving me out... I've been included for so long... I don't know if I could go back to being the outcast, without a serious change in myself...

How can I be so selfish? I love my sister, and in the past, that's the only thing I wanted her to have, and to watch from the sidelines, and feel her joy... but... *sighs* Why must I be so tender-hearted? I guess loneliness is my weakness...

And don't get me wrong... seeing her have fun again, that's the greatest joy I can ever ask for, a month ago... that would've been enough... but now... I'm not sure... *sighs* I love you...

=!RETRO!=