Just kidding. I wanted to see how many people would actually come here even though it is Lost posting night for me.
The week after a Kate episode. There's nowhere to go but up from here, right? Exactly.
-- Lost was just dumped into American Beauty.
-- This must be the most boring half a minute of Locke's day.
-- Oh snap. Locke's married to Leela.
-- ... I prefer the reality where Locke isn't in the bath.
-- Locke's dad? Does he actually have a decent relationship with him?
-- "Free is free."
-- This is what Evil Locke sees every day, isn't it?
-- "Get ready for the sexin'."
-- "Oh, hey, insufferable prick. Nice to see you."
-- Asssssssssssssssssssssshooooooooooooooooooooooooooooole
-- A presidential candidate?
-- "After I beat the crap out of you, the respect would have come."
-- omg jungle claire
-- "Would you like me to comfort you?"
-- "I ate Jacob with some fava beans and a nice chianti."
-- Locke is a college coach?
-- Smoke Monster is going to repremand his rebellious son, Smokey.
-- "Am I drunk, or am I drunk?"
-- Sawyer pours two glasses, drinks them both. "I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM"
-- "You're not dead, James."
-- "I have a good bar."
-- They definitely toned down that moment for TV.
-- Now THOSE are some muttonchops.
-- "Randy, he's a prick. Fuck him."
-- Alternate Hurley is a badass.
-- "Hopefully Olmec will greet us."
-- That was Ben's, "Are you fucking kidding me?" face.
-- Someone tell Dennis the Menance that its star escaped.
-- Evil Locke and Sawyer just developed an awkward father-son relationship.
-- I'm glad my job interview didn't suck this much.
-- That's it. Hurley is the god of this world. He is connected to everyone.
-- "Damn. Cancer > paralysis. I lose."
-- I keep expecting Sawyer to interrupt this speech with a gunshot.
-- He also knows how to use pretty words.
-- "Let's just toss Nikki and Paolo's corpses into the ocean to save room."
-- LOL Most inappropriate eulogy in history.
-- Aww. Ben. ;-;
-- Lapidus needs to speak more.
-- Doesn't Locke's corpse look kind of uptight? Maybe he turned British for no reason.
-- Nice job making that lady feel like shit, Locke.
-- "One corpse ... oh, you're not Mr. Shepard? Oh. I'm sorry."
-- "A million dollars?! You went on Deal or No Deal without me?!"
-- "Yeah, yeah, I've heard that one before."
-- "You're not going to marry me?! ... Oh. That."
-- *cough* *cough* Sorry, just have some irony in my throat ...
-- Those are some strong arms Sawyer has.
-- "This is where I weigh my rocks."
-- Oh, Evil Locke. You and your inside jokes.
-- The writing's on the wall for Sawyer! Ha ha ha!
-- Basketball coach is definitely one of the more ironic jobs for Locke.
-- "Which I can't use any more, by the way!!!!!"
-- THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING THING EVER
-- YES YES YES YES YES
-- Aw. I was hoping for Principal Ben.
-- "That guy was a fuckhead, that's why."
-- ... Each of them is a number? AGH. HEAD HURT. SO BADLY. WHAT.
-- Most strikethrough tags ever, amirite?
-- Protector of the island would be a wonderful job. lol j/k
-- All said, wouldn't Hurley be the best protector? Not in terms of effectiveness, but in terms of entertainment. The island would be one big party all the time. The worst would clearly be Jack. Kate doesn't count because she would run before ever accepting the job.
-- Evil Locke is definitely not puppeteering Sawyer right now. Nope. No sir.
Not really a huge episode, action-wise, but some more plot business. There's probably more to this "protector of the island" business than meets the eye right now, so I am not going to comment much on that. I'm guessing that Evil Locke needs all the potential candidates dead so that he can hightail it off the island, though. Interestingly, there is more confirmation that he is bound by rules -- smoke monster can't get through the ring of ashes, Evil Locke couldn't kill Jacob himself and that kid is all, "You better not kill Sawyer now, y'hear?" Even when someone else is using his body, people are telling Locke what he can and can't do.
Much like everyone else, Locke's life is mixed off the island. He gets some sweet, sweet lovin' (or maybe not), but his job still sucks, and he is just as frustrated as ever. At least Hurley still has his kickin' muttonchops. And even Ben has found some steady work! That school must have been really desperate for teachers. His class probably has a 100 percent pass rate on the AP European History exam, though. You wouldn't want to let down a man that creepy.
