(My response for this week's writing prompt.)
"It'll Grow Back"
They say that I am accident prone
And kind of blind to boot,
So why I chose construction work
for life was not astute.
We built a house the other day
along a quiet row,
In fact that was the very day
I severed my first toe.
Someone reciting ribald rhymes
kept focus from mine eyes,
So when that big steel bar fell down
it caught me by surprise.
I barely felt it coming down
or cutting through my shoe,
But in the end, what once was one
had now been split in two.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A few months later back I came
in time for fixing doors,
And when the job was through and done
I bled the blood bank's stores.
A nail gun and a mighty sneeze
pinned door frame to my arm,
And when said door frame all fell down
my elbow bought the farm.
Again, the others cursed and screamed
as blood dripped through the floors,
And I promised myself that day:
"No more god damn doors!"
So there I was with half an arm
and more sick leave to come,
But if there's consolation,
I still have my right-side thumb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So with a metal hook equipped
I'm back on-site to build,
Though others give me heavy berth
For fear they might get killed.
I laugh it off, it's hard too feel
so down about such cares,
'Cause really, there's not time for that
while working on the stairs.
Just screwing in a railing
for the stairway seemed so clear,
Don't ask me how it happened
but somehow I screwed my ear.
Those jerks they took a picture
while another set me free,
My ear was fine, but then I tripped
and smashed my one good knee.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The knee and ear healed fast, and yet
my foreman had enough,
He called me clumsy, stupid, dumb
and other nasty stuff.
He took me off the building site
and to a little desk,
He figured drawing building plans
might leave me less grotesque.
I hate the desk work oh so much
so all I do is cry,
But as my buried face in hands
my pencil found my eye.
The boss had had enough
and told me it was time to go,
So off I went with one good eye,
one arm, one knee, sans toe.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I will admit the past few months
have been especially bad,
But none of that compares to
what came next, I fear... it's sad.
While in a bar I had some drinks
and more 'cause it still hurt,
Then I grew angry, knocking bottles
over, on my shirt.
The bottles smashed and then I slipped
and fell upon the glass,
I cut my neck, my back and and hand
and even shaved my ass.
The glass had hurt but cuts can heal,
at least that's what I'm told,
But sadly my poor tushie now
is feeling awful' cold...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My peers, they call me "idiot"
and give me tons of flak,
So now I have but one last wish...
...that it'll all grow back...
