Matt Tsuki

Warning: this WORLD occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors).

Fan Art :: Wallpapers :: eCards

Buttercup Festival :: xkcd :: A Softer World

Critics United

Tumblr

Art Trades :: CLOSED

Requests :: CLOSED

Pancake

HAPPY ST PATTIES DAY!
That is all.

Windows

I just had a premonition of the future. Here, I'll share it with you now.

Just recently, over on another 'art sharing' website DeviantART a very active member up and left. His reasons were, that the site was just not what it used to be; that it was becoming something entirely unrecognizable* from what he knew it as. This former member was part of the site for nine, almost ten years and at one point was a paid worker for the site.

This got me thinking about theOTAKU. The site is changing, and growing as it rightfully should. Although, I am unsure of where it is going. It has changed quite a bit since when I first joined, and even than from when I was simply a 'lurker' (anyone remember the colour scheme than?). I am sure that is all well and good those changes but I wonder where we are going.

Will I look back at this site nine or ten years from now and find logging into theOTAKU a burden and simply undesirable? What will the site even look like in that amount of years- and I don't mean just the colour scheme (I'm pineing for red, just so ya'll know).

Maybe I'm just thinking to much- but its still worrying all the same.

*entirely all paraphrasing- not a direct quote.

le short

They've changed stuff around here again. And not just the funny ad background I mean.

Man how I do not take to change well.

Oh well.

SPACE

Dear Earth,
We’re still sweet on you and everything, and you totally remain one of our favorite spheres- but over the last couple months, something has changed between us. You’re different. You’ve grown colder, less hospitable. You’ve grown… darker.
In the hopes that you’re willing to change, we wrote this poem for you.
Love,
Everyone.

Like, WTF, Earth?
In the annals of what prompts despair
Ranked just above losing ones hair
(but below wedding a Kardashian)
Is the sun going down at 4 p.m.

The roads with headlights are festooned
Through the clock says it’s still afternoon.
Our skin so pale, our moods defective
Disorders seasonally affective.

The early dusk makes tempers short
Our smiles the dark will surely thwart.
Reduced we are to glares and glowers
When our star is keeping banker’s hours.

And in our homes as many yawns
As shirtless scenes in Breaking Dawn.
Pjs, slippers, vim diminished
And Jeopardy’s not even finished.

Up north the dark’s a constant pest
The sun no more than fleeting guest.
It peeks out briefly just to tease
Like a thong above a women’s jeans.

December’s global truth behold!
Some must be hot, some others cold.
A tilt of 23 degrees
Makes Earth one big McDLT.

(Was that last reference too obscure?
I know that’s not the meal de jour.
But I thought it surely would be glib
To compare our Earth to a McRib.)

Each year it takes us by surprise
The early gloaming, late sunrise
The street light coming on at four
And your grumpy eight-year-old just swore.

Come summer we’ll stand in ovation
To praise the ways of your rotation.
But a curse, a hex, a thousand pox
Upon autumnal equinox.

And winter solstice, even worse,
The hour of dusk just plain perverse.
It’s a cruel and truly heartless ruse
To make a day short as Tom Cruise.

Across our cranky hemisphere
There comes a unifying cheer:
Hey Earth- get off your lazy axis!
Autumn’s no time to relaxis.

We hear you’re suffering climate change
Hot flashes have you feeling strange.
And word is that we are the cause
Of your planetary menopause.

Perhaps a deal we can beget
(Though technically it’s more a threat):
Spare us from the winter bummers
Or we’ll all buying H2 Hummers.

It’s not as though we’re asking much
Just angle your fat arse a touch
So your top half leans toward the sun
And the next four months don’t make us glum.

For some there’ll be a cost, we’ll vouch
The briefer daylight hours will ouch
Much like a kick in the genitalia
Thanks for your sacrifice, Australia.

Scott Feschuk

Consumer Report

UPDATE!
Update?
Update to what?

-

Welcome to my WORLD! I got around to changing how it looks and all, in celebration of the horrible weather that I know is coming for me. I guess 'celebration' is a bad word to use in that case but I'm alright with that.

In case anyone has ever really wondered; I DO happen to update my introduction on requests and art trades. This is a not so subtle hint for you all you do art trades with me because I have zero creative engery left in these bones.

QUICKLY NOW!

Also if anyone wants to design a cool background for here I'd be down with that. Right now this is a bit of a place holder because I don't feel like whipping one up.

IN OTHER NEWS- Skyrim! Yes my darlings, its news about that. And how wonderful news it is. Wonderful game; I'm very proud of how it was handeled. I am still at war with the graphics, but the fighting, NPC's, and equipment is all amazing.

Although the snow is starting to get to me.

I hate snow.