Skyrim (Companions)

"Here's your sword..." I said slamming the weapon down onto the table. Vilkas-the stupid Viking!- looked up from the book he was reading with surprise.

"By Ysgramor! What happened to you?!" he asked after taking in my appearance. I groaned as I fell into the chair next to him, placing my head into my hands.

"Well.... it started when I fell down the stairs...."

Flashback

After Vilkas handed me his sword, I watched as he left heading back into the warmth of Jorrvaskr. I glanced around me to see if anyone was watching. No one was around to see what I did next. Grinning, I ran up the steps that lead to the Skyforge. As I neared the top I didn't realize there was an extra stair waiting for a victim to trip over it and fall down the stone steps.

Landing on my back, I groaned casting a healing spell on myself, grinning as I immediately feeling better and surprise I didn't kill myself. Just as I stood up ready to take on the steps again, a courier popped up. I mean litteral popped up from nowhere.

"How did-"

"No time for chatting! Important message!" he said quickly throwing a piece of balled up at me.

"Dude there was no-" but before I could finish saying that, he had ran off.

I swear I hate them so much!

Grumbling I picked up the paper. It was a letter from Siddgeir, the Jarl of Falkreath.

"What does he want?" I wondered out loud quickly scanning over the letter. He has terrible handwriting.... but I got the gist of it. A dragon was attacking his Hold and guess who has to go and deal with it? I looked between the letter and the Skyforge. Delay to get a sword sharpened for a Viking or go save a Hold?

I exited the city and ran towards the Whiterun Stable's. Thankfully they were still tending to the horses when I arrived.

"I need a horse." I said. The Nord looked at me and said, "You can have this one for a thousand gold."

"A thousand?!"

"Yes, did I stutter?"

"I was hoping you were..." I said taking out a bag of gold. The Nord snatched it quickly and pointed to a white horse. "It's all yours."

"Better be the best horse..." I muttered.

"Nah, the best horse is 40,000."

.... By gods, has the world really came down to the point where horses cost more than a manor?

By the time I reached the Hold, the dragon that was attacking had settled itself on some poor soul's home as it Shouted, creating a wall of fire around it. Oh yeah, this was going to be hard.

About two hours, 5 healing potions, and 200 arrows later, I had left the Hold after collecting my reward. As I was crossing over the border into Whiterun, my horse suddenly gave way tossing me off. As I stood up, I saw a male Khajiit holding two steel daggers like a ninja.

"I AM BOB OF THE DARK BROTHERHOOD AND I AM SENT TO KILL YOU!" he annoced doing some flashy ninja moves. I looked at the assassin for awhile before speaking.

"Bob?"

"YES BOB! WHAT'S WRONG WITH BOB?!"

"Well... most people around here have names like Ulfric, Ireith, Aela, Fakus, Vilkas, and I think one guy was name Fairy..." Bob sighed and stood like a regular person.

"My parent's weren't very creative. Now can you just stand there and let me kill you? I'm on the edge of losing my job and my wife just left me..." he said. I took out my own two steel swords glaring at him.

"Oh heck no!"

End

"And then I came back, fell down the steps again, and got your sword sharpen. Your welcome." I finished telling my story which had drew a crowd. They all looked at me quietly.

"How the hell do you fall down the steps twice?"