Hey folks it’s me, Yours truly
I’ve been thinking about the reason why I joined The Otaku and want I really wanted to do in my life. Life been so confusing/changing lately and just has me thinking so much…
Yeah, it’s going to be one of those posts… D:
I remember back in 2006 when I first start visiting theO for all the mew fan art. Man, good times… Good times… Like now Tokyo Mew Mew was my shitz, I love the show and still do now. I always love seeing mews created by the fans and all the cool ideas everyone had. It was so fresh for me at that time, like a new born baby. I wanted so bad to join and post my mew ideas too but I didn’t have a scanner, my lab top was compete garbage because it had more viruses then an ally way whore, and I’m so paranoid that my art would get stolen. But none the less it was still awesome.
What really pulled me in was to interact with all the wonderful young artists (Man I sound like an internet Perv lol). I always hang out with younger people rather then teens around my age. Even through middle school I hang out with the youngsters that were around 7-12 when I was 14. My peers just didn’t interest me much at all. I was never into the stuff they were. Like the boys and whatever else D:. I mean when my childhood friends start chasing boys around the neighbor hood and all that puberty shit I was at home playing video games and hitting it off with the younger crowd ;P. Hell even my ex best friend was two years younger then me D: (and the ass hat want to give me lectures and shit, bitch please >__>)
Anyway yeah, another thing I wanted was help the younger artists. I love helping the up coming artist especially knowing what they are going through as far as getting their own style or needed help on drawing the body or just whatever. Hell, all of us upcoming or master artist need help :).
Sometimes thinking about this it feels like I’m not doing it well, because I never want to rub the artist the wrong way giving him/her a critique. But I always give some encouragement and tell them what I like on the picture. Even with that sometimes I say the same shit like cute or awesome. I always believe that a comment should be appreciated no matter how generic it is but sometime I like to mix it up a little you know?
I don’t know…
Yeah, that’s the reason I joined here, and before that I was just watching theo for around a year maybe?
But boy I never regretted being here! I made lots of awesome friends! I maintained my anime style while learning to draw more realistically these pass 3 years. I never posted any of that art because it was from a comic me and my ex friend was doing and that I never used that style in any of my mew pictures. Maybe I’ll post a picture or two; I’ve always wanted to show you guys after all :3. Also I got really good at my shading since that Mew Ringo picture, maybe I’ll do a lil’ showing off XD…
Writing all this and thinking about it TheO really helped me out a lot. More then I realize.
Then thinking about what I want to do in my life, which gets really confusing… I wanted to be a game designer for years (and before that a vet) but now it seems like their might be other roads I want to go down. Being in ITT Tech and my major is multimedia/information technology it really opened up other careers I might want to take. Like web design and advertisement pretty much anything that I can be artistic with and can use Photoshop or something like that. To have a job in that field and make good money and live happily ever after.
Then one day I had an idea to have my own internet shop. Yeah, just typing it gets me excited about it yet I feel kinda lame, a good lame :D. I think I would sell web layouts, my art, cards, and t-shirts pretty much my art on anything you can think of. I looked on other people’s web sites who did that and I thought “wow, that’s cool I can see my self doing that”. Then I don’t have to worry about dead lines or bosses and shit like that. But most of all the part I love the most is that I can create whatever I want and sell it to people! Then the bummer part is how do I even begin to start? What do I have to do to even consider a choice like this? When I graduate school and the damn bill I have to pay for like the rest of my life comes in, will I make enough to pay it and eventually move out to live on my own? This is the kind of shit that makes me want to piss my pants… But steering away form this kind of thinking >__<
I would love to do but it kinda scares the living crap out of me at the same time point blank. But I know I can do it if I knew what to do and if the road wasn’t so foggy. I mean there are like 1000 other things I feel I can do but I just don’t know where to go. It gets tiring, frustrating and mind consuming. Then it feels like I don’t have much time since I’ll graduate June of next year. It’s like high school all over again. I had no clue where to go but I knew I didn’t want to go to college, then ITT called up and they sounded good so I decided to go there. I pretty much drifted into where I am now. I don’t regret coming to ITT so it’s not like it’s a bad thing. But what happens now? I’m not sure my good luck drifting will make everything fall in place for me.
I don’t know… Everything is just not making any sense to me right now… It’s like those goddamn trick answers in math class…
Then I start seeing those super cute charms that seems to be all the rage now a days. I thought they were so cute and more and more people are making them. I saw a few tutorials on them and thought “wow, they are easy to make!” The more I saw them the more I wanted to make some of my own and probably sell too! So on Wednesday I blew my 20 bucks on the materials I would need to make them, and thank the sculpty gods for having a sale on the sculpty clay. They were a dollar when they are usually two.
So that night I made one of those chocolate squares and a little devil chibi. I enjoyed the hell of making them and then taking such a risk as to spend 20 dollars that isn’t manga or something from hot topic is new to me haha, then its been a while where I had 20 to spend on my self so I wanted something that was fulfilling.
Then that internet shop is in my head and the same shit…
I don’t know… D: I just wanted to get this out of my system. So yeah this post is hella long. This is like 75% of what’s been on my mind.
Maybe I should stop thinking so hard about it. I’m on my fall vacation (no school next week woo!) so I finally have time to relax and do the things I wanted to do. Its not like I’m graduate tomorrow so I DO have some time to think it over and who knows what can happen between now the then…
Thanks to all who read this, my posts are getting longer so its nice to see people read the whole thing.
So thanks :3 ( here’s an even bigger cookie)
