I know i've been relle down lately well its only getting worse. i feel i have no friends. i dont know what to do. im more mad at the people im friends with now for ingnoring me and doing everything they want to with eachother than the time someone pissed in my soda. But unfortanatly both times i couldnt controll my feeling. I tried so hard, you wouldnt beieve, not to cry. yet i did. It didnt help when all three of them came over becuase it set it off again. just cody, he kept scewing with me making fun of me. I cant take it. Ya know whats funny this reminds me of something i dont wanna say it, i relle dont. But cody reminds me of harley. Hope told me harley tries splitting up friends. He's probably not doing it on purpose but thats how it feels. I awlays used to be made fun of on the bus i grew up with it. It relle sucks. I don't feel like talking to hope and i dont want to talk to cody anymore. I dont know about amber shes relle awesome. but....idk i hate it!!!! i wish i could like die, get hit by a car something. I know i'll just never drink water again and then i'll have kidney failure and i wont have anything to worry about anymore. i hope someone throws me down a staircase. it happend before, unfortunaly i didnt get hurt *sigh* goddamn it. I relle wanted amber to come over to. w.e. i dont care anymore. its the end of my star wars days XCCc screw this. i hate myself. I dont know why i even feel this way it soooo screwed up. Maybe its because cody hates me and hope and amber love him and do whatever with him. like hope always bitches at me and it pissed me off sooooooo much when she did something with cody that she yelled at me for doing. Im soo sad. Im sorry this post is long. A lot happend. I wish i never went. things would be a lot better. even if i was mad at my mom. now i just dont know who to talk to or be friends with anymore. i guess i just wont......