i feel like all my friends are to
busy to notice the way i feel. i want to be with my friends so they
will help me mask my depression. i feel like i have no use in life. i
love to draw and write but thats it, i have no one who loves me for
who i am. i get close to my friends and they call me 'clingy', i try
not to be 'clingy' and i seem like a blob that does nothing. i need
help to feel like I'm living for something. I've thought of suicide
but i cant do it because of the friends i have an my family. i feel
selfish for wanting my friends to care about me, when they claim they
do. i feel selfish for wanting my friends at all times then wanting
them to go away suddenly. i want to hide away and change my haircolor
and name, i want to steal my moms car and drive until the tank runs
out of gas, i want to be alone, but i want to be with people. i cant
vent myself through daydreams and drawing and roleplaying forever, i
want a fantasy to come true. i hate everything about myself and
others, i dont want to face school where i will be ignored and unloved
for the remaining of my school life. I need friends and someone to
love, i need someone to rant too. i hate everything