Today, I went to my first counseling appointment. I spent all last night being so nervous and anxious, I couldn't sleep. Finally, I passed out around 2 AM, probably from the stress. When I woke up this morning, however, I felt strangely calm. I took a shower, got dressed, and the whole time, I felt... almost tranquil? The whole car ride consisted of my Mom carrying the conversation, while I attempted to harden my resolve. In my head, I kept saying to myself, "This is the point of no return. You can't go back now. There is only forward." and, this thought would usually make me hysteric - but, this time, it was what kept my insides from coming unglued. Once we got there, I filled out some left over paperwork, and then we were taken in back, where the offices are. My counselor seems nice, like a young elementary school teacher. I think I'll have an easier time talking to her. The lady at MHMR made me anxious, so I was worried this lady would too. This is the first step. The first step is always the hardest, but it has to be taken. I just hope I'm prepared.