Last Friday, I had nothing to say. Nothing was happening here in the city called "Silent Hill". Last Saturday, things happened. I thought about them, but because more things happened on Sunday I had to let those things go. Then Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday ticked by. In a few more hours it'll be Friday again. All the things that happened, all the words I'd thought about, all the analyses are still there vaguely floating around in my mind but not nearly as crisp and neatly organized as when I'd originally thought to write about them. Every night I thought, "I should do that," but I didn't because it was more important to go and be with the people who for some reason or another keep me around.

at one time there was a photo here explaining the next paragraph, but it's lost...

I am in love with these two girls. The Umi and Fuu to my Hikaru. The Hachi and Misato to my Nana. My Nichole and Beth of Japan. Stacey and Sarah. On Tuesday we were all at a horribly boring teaching seminar and during the last speech of the day Sarah decided to lay her head on my shoulder. This isn't a new occurrence, people do it to me all the time. I'm tall. I'm used to it. But for some reason I had the most panicky feeling. Like I couldn't breathe. Well, more I shouldn't breathe perhaps.........I asked the boys if they get that way and got three of the best, most 気にっている answers ever out of them. Brian, the perverted joker answer, Mel, the sneaky liar answer, and of course Pin, the sentimental thinker answer. I love my boys too.

Wednesday was Stacey's birthday. She's 23. It seems like a million years ago that I was 23. Can't say I miss it really, but she'll be happy there. I was proud of myself yesterday. All I wanted was for her to be happy and I think I did good.

I'm glad it's nearly Thanksgiving. We need our Passover. Our moment of solace and cohesion. It's getting cold outside. Maybe I can't save everyone by myself, but if I can give them all a little of what they need maybe they can save each other.